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Adventures In Living With The Mythical |
| Everyone could feel the fight brewing. This wasn't going to be a simple neighborly spat. The kind where we come in, say a mean comment, and leave before the cake is sliced and everyone talks shit about each other behind our backs. No. This fight was brewing up to be a knock down, drag out Christmas Eve fight. The kind of fight that destroys Christmas gatherings. The type of fights the police end up knowing everyone by name for. Judith pulled me into a conspiratorial whisper. "What happened between them," she asked. Denise and Crash were still glaring at each other. I knew they could hear us in the kitchen so I just gave Judith a simple shrug and whispered back "We'll probably find out. Don't pry too much." I had hoped she would take the hint. "So," Crash said loudly. A bit too loudly. "Are you still in horticulture? Perhaps doing any extracurricular gardening?" "No, I swear," Denise said back. A hint of fear and anger in her voice. "I haven't been doing any of that. I don't seem to find the time anymore. Darin keeps me pretty busy." Before we could hear anymore, Darin came storming out of the garage. "No dad! Denise isn't like that!" He rounded the corner and glared at Crash. "And she doesn't need any flea-bitten cop wannabe harassing her. You got a problem? Get a warrant. Come on Denise." Crash had that mischievous glint in his eye. "Goodbye Denise. Or should I say, Clara Gartner." Everyone in the house stopped at that moment and turned to look at Denise. Everyone but me. A look of horror washed over Judith's face. Me? I was just surprised. "Who?" Denise snarled at Crash, fur bristling on her arms. "Oh, Fuck you," she snarled, shoving Crash backwards. He giggled, landing on his back foot and coming forward again. Fur had grown down his arms, and his fingers were starting to form claws. "Okay, okay," I shouted. Raising my hands I stepped between them. "Before we destroy someone's house, why don't we all take a deep breath. Explain what's going on. And tell it like we've never heard this story before." "Clara Gartner's dead, Crash, I told you that," She snarled, pointing a finger at him. Her head horns were beginning to show. A muzzle was forming on her face. "I made a mistake, and damn it I paid for it! Isn't losing my home enough?! You have to take my love, too?!" Crash had a muzzle forming on his face as well. It wouldn't be long before we were standing in a warzone. "I want to know, Clara, if you're up to your usual bullshit, or if you're truly done! You know what I'm supposed to do if I ever saw you again!" Darin stepped in front of Denise, holding his arms out. "You'll have to go through me." I looked at Darin. "That's sweet. And a good way to get a concussion for free. If you're lucky. Step away." Darin glared at me. "I don't know you. I know him and her. You step away before I hurt you." I laughed. Even Crash blinked at my laugh. It was a dark laugh, something you'd hear a Saturday morning villain give. "Oh, son. I'm going to do your parents a favor and pretend I didn't hear you say that." I looked over at Crash and said "Start talking." It was Denise who began. "I made a mistake. I paid for it. I lost my house, my job, my life..." Crash laughed. "Your job was literally selling poison to humans. You're lucky you didn't get killed." She snarled. "It wasn't to humans! I was selling to werewolves, minotaurs, creatures to who could partake and enjoy the high, not to humans. How was I to know!" What shook me about all of this, was that Darin wasn't. These revelations appeared as if it was something he had already known. He kept glaring at Crash, kept his hands held out like he's trying to stop traffic. "Denise, you don't owe that asshole anything. He has no probable cause. Come on." He even tried to grab her shoulder. Crash looked at her and said "You better explain things to him or I will. He won't like how I'm gonna do it." She sighed and touched Darin's shoulder. "We don't get those kinds of rights, Darin. It's different for us different creatures." She glared at Crash. "But I literally have done nothing! You have no right to threaten me or attack me here." Judith stepped in the middle at this moment along with Gary. "Now this has gone on far enough!" She glared at Denise first. "You can't sit at a table like that. Shrink back down proper, now." Gary glared at Crash. "I didn't ask you over here to destroy my home! Get to normal, and lets eat!" We all made our way towards a dining room table near the back of the house beyond the kitchen. Darin grabbed his father and growled in his ear where he didn't think I could hear it. "Why did you invite them? To interrogate Denise? Or to change my mind?" Gary's face went sheet white for a moment. "I'm just trying to protect us all." The table was set. Burgers in the middle with dogs, buns on either side. Toppings was within easy reach and passed around. A large bowl of french fries too. Ketchup, mustard, mayo. The table was topped with a vinyl cloth that would be easy to wipe clean. The room was a normal size, but felt smaller due to Crash and Denise both rather large sizes. Judith tried to set them away from each other, but the table wasn't big enough to separate them too far. We all sat down, me next to Crash, Darin next to Denise. With Judith and Gary on opposite sides of course. This meant I was across from Denise, and Darin across from Crash. There was more than enough snarls to go around, with all of us staring at our empty plates or the food, no one looking at each other. Gary started us off in a prayer of sorts. "Why don't we all go around the table and name one thing we're thankful for. I'll start. I'm thankful for the wonderful food, my son, his new fiance, Judith and our understanding neighbors." Next it was Denise's turn. "I'm thankful for everyone sitting here," she said. Darin glared at Crash one last time and said "I'm thankful for Denise, and my parents." It came around to Judith who said "I'm thankful for peace." Then it came around to me. I was trying to lighten the mood. I swear I was. Given the circumstances it was the exact wrong thing to say at the exact wrong time. I am many things, but smart in this kind of a crowd of people is not one of them. I opened my mouth and gave a smile. "I'm glad Denise didn't grow any of the vegetables." Darin snarled at me, Crash suppressed a giggle, and Denise sighed. I didn't see the responses of the other two, but that set the ball rolling. "Well, I'll have you know," she said, "I have a very green thumb. I'm pretty good at growing vegetables." "Most minotaur's do," Crash said. She glared at Crash. "What the hell is that supposed to mean?" Crash sighed. "It's your religion, 'Denise' what the hell do you think it means?" She stood, and snarled "I think it means it's about time I gored ya." I stood and shouted "ALRIGHT! It was a joke! I'm sorry, just a joke! Trying to lighten the mood! I didn't mean anything by it! Please sit down, let's calm down." Darin grabbed Denise for a moment and left the room. Judith and Gary did likewise, having some sort of family discussion. I turned to Crash and asked "Are you being too hard on her?" He whispered "she indirectly poisoned a fourteen year old child. One of her associates was reselling her crop. She claimed she didn't intend for him to do that. I had to kill her associate and banish her. The child she almost killed just barely made it out of the coma six weeks later." I swallowed hard. "Oh." When Darin returned with his head down, and his fists balled up. He forced himself to unclench them, and took a deep breath. "For everyone's peace of mind. I am aware of Denise's past. She's very apologetic, and I, for one, believe her. Though we don't worship the same God, I allow her to do her work in the garden, and she comes to church with me on Sunday. Every year, she makes a deposit in that child's name to a bank account. The kid thinks they have some sort of college scholarship. Now, are we ready to put this behind us? Please?" We all looked at each other. There was a period of silence. Crash looked at Denise as if waiting for the other shoe to drop. She snarled at him. "I want a peaceful meal. But, mutt, you have insulted me for the last time. After dinner, me and you, outside." I had one hot dog, one hamburger, a plate of fries, and a slice of delicious Devil's food cake to attempt to convince Denise and Crash not to fight. Cause I knew if they did fight, something inside the family, and our neighborly friendship, would be damaged forever. |
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