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 |    Not for the faint of art. |
Hey, it's one of my favorite subjects, too! What a coincidence!   PROMPT November 16th This one will cover one of my favorite subjects, Food. Do you follow a certain regimen/diet when it comes to eating? Other than something you might be allergic to, are there any foods you avoid or limit yourself to? What's your favorite meal to prepare. Share your recipe if you like. (I have a 'killer' chocolate recipe!)  Tonight, I made my beer chili again. Normally I use ground beef, but there was some ground pork in the fridge for whatever reason, so I blended the two in an unholy blasphemous union, and it worked. The chili is something I like to do when it starts getting colder. I'll get tired of it after a while and put the recipe away until next fall. I don't accept the existence of "comfort food," but there are certainly things I like for certain times of year or moods. Do you follow a certain regimen/diet when it comes to eating? Yep, a seafood diet. When I see food, I eat it. I followed what you might call a diet or eating regimen for two years. I lost over a hundred pounds. Then I reached a point of diminishing returns. Then it got to where I was eating 1200-1300 calories a day and not drinking, and I was still gaining weight. So I said fuck that, if I'm going to become a cliché and regain the weight anyway, I might as well enjoy what I'm eating. Hence the return of my cooking. Other than something you might be allergic to, are there any foods you avoid or limit yourself to? For a long time, I wasn't allergic to any food or medicine. I mean, nothing. I'd go to the hospital and they'd ask me again and again, and each time I said "nothing," they had a look of shock and disbelief on their faces, just like when I said I have no more than one alcoholic beverage a day (which at the time was true). I was pretty proud of my lack of allergies, too. Everyone else has an allergy, mostly so they can be unique, and I didn't, which made me actually unique. It's a superpower! Until a couple of years ago when I ate a protein bar with an obscure spice from India called moringa, and my skin turned red in patches and my lips puffed up and my tongue blew up and everything went numb and my heart started racing and my vision faded and I could feel my blood pressure plummet as I collapsed. I survived. Obviously. But I had discovered my Kryptonite. Fortunately, it lives on almost the exact opposite side of the planet from me. Except when they put it in goddamn energy bars. Anyway. Apart from that, I only have one hard and fast rule: I never eat anything smarter than I am. Why? Because anything smarter than I am would find a way to take revenge. We know that corvids will remember a wrong done unto them  and exact a hundredfold vengeance upon the perpetrator. How much worse, then, for the genius eldritch horrors of the deep such as squids and octopodes? Granted, they might have a problem tracking me down on land, but as soon as I get into the water, Boom! Hentai city.I do make an exception for pigs, though, because they're just so damn tasty. So I guess it's not that hard and fast a rule. What's your favorite meal to prepare. Share your recipe if you like. The great thing about being single is I can cook whatever I want, without worrying about picky eaters not liking my mushrooms or complaining about the ghost pepper. The crappy thing about being single is that either I cook something that keeps, like the chili, or a lot of food gets wasted, because there are no recipes for single-serving things. And even if there were, shit's not sold in single-person portions at the supermarket. Anyway, what would be the point? I'm not trying to impress anyone. So here's the recipe for my favorite meal: 1) Pull box from freezer 2) Partially unwrap and shove into microwave. 3) Nuke and eat. Okay, it's not my favorite recipe, unless by "favorite" you mean what I do most often. And yes, I exaggerate. I don't actually do a lot of microwave meals. I admit to a fondness for Marie Callender's pot pies, but those flat-out suck if you nuke them; I (uncharacteristically) take the time to bake them in the oven. Fortunately, I ate before writing this so it didn't make me hungry. Might have some of that chocolate, though. |
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