Emily, My Muse

I am
A marionette puppet
Dropped into this world
Playing roles in others lives
But never deserving of
their eyes
Their hearts
Their minds
Always in the quietest moments
Acquainted with my consciousness for more than a fleeting scene
I find myself dreaming

I dream like her, staring at the same stars her prayers were whispered to
Dreaming like Emily Dickinson for 'a carriage'
My wish that 'Death would stop for me'
Asking why he must take so long
I dream of him
I dream of more than a carriage ride
I dream of more than visits in my mind
Yearning intertwined with my whispers
Why must he torture me so
Purring sweet nothings that
Caress my heart
My bleeding mind
Kissing my cheeks of the tears of my desperation

Sitting solidly on the blue ocean floor
Of my soul
He sees me so earnestly
So vulnerably
I have no privacy with him there
Eye to eye, soul to undying soul
Death, I’ve come to see, never leaves me
As I look down at him from my cage on the shore
Only when the waves between us become violent
Do I lose sight of his figure standing firmly before me
Never gone
Tranquility incarnate
Waiting for the noise to subside
So we may begin again
Riding together in that carriage
If only for a time (an hour)
My craving for him never satiated
Only placated