Afterwards

    He looked down at the man lying lifeless in front of him. His heart beat loud enough for anybody else in the room to hear, he thought. But he killed that anybody else. He heard a loud slam and jumped back. Did someone just knock? Did this guy just wake up? What the fuck was that? Ben started to breathe louder and louder until he realized that he had dropped the gun on the floor. How could he ever get used to this?

    Ben walked out the front door wearing his favourite shades and stopped outside to feel the sun on his skin. He had made it out alive, again. His hands trembled less every time but his heart pounded just as hard. He started walking looking forward, too scared to look to either side. He didn’t want to see anybody’s face. Maybe if he couldn’t see them, they couldn’t see him. He started going down the same path that he always took.

    Straight ahead about 50 yards and continuing on past the thirty story tall buildings on either side, Ben came back to reality. Drivers were honking their horns as they sat stuck in traffic. Bikers sped past the parked cars, weaving through them almost as if to mock them. A mother pushed her baby in a stroller on the opposite side of the street carrying her spoils from a day out shopping. Every time the location would change. Ben had never been able to figure out how they were doing it.

    “I wonder when they’re going to call next, huh?” Ben asked a stranger walking by.

    “The fuck you want?” came the response as the man kept walking.

    Ben laughed to himself as he turned around and started walking. “Now, where could I possibly be?” he said to himself. He desperately needed to have a normal conversation, even if it was with himself. He finally reached a major intersection and found that he was on St. Laurent. He suddenly noticed that he in fact did recognize the area. The coffee shop across the street and the head shop right next to it looked very familiar. The shop with a fluorescent marijuana leaf on the front stood out amongst the looming office buildings. Suits walked past it without giving it any thought. It was a business district full of tall buildings; buildings full of people that did stuff Ben knew nothing about. 

    Ben went into the Bank that was on his way. This was always the most bitter-sweet moment. After the first few times, Ben decided that taking advantage was the best thing to do. If they were going to give him money for killing, he mind as well just take it.

    “Hi, how may I help you today?”

    “I’d like to withdraw some cash, please.”

    “Okay, I just need you to slide in your card and enter your pin”

    2 7 0 5. What could these numbers possibly mean? This account had been given to him and he was told to never change the pin. But how could they just tell him not to change the pin like that?

    “Never change the pin? How come? Are they special numbers or something? Will something happen if I change the pin?”

    “I’m just repeating what I’ve been instructed to tell you. These are the rules, you must comply.”

    “But you must know! They must have expected I’d ask!”

    “I’m just repeating what I’ve been instructed to tell you. These are the rules, you must comply.”

    It had been a very frustrating day. The man refused to give him any more information than was permitted and spoke in a monotone voice that made Ben want to slap him in the face.

    “How much would you like?”

    “What’s my current balance?”

    “Twenty thousand dollars.”

    Twenty thousand? Had he already reached the first increment? It took him a few seconds before he realized that it had indeed been his sixth time.

    “I’ll take five thousand dollars, please.”

    “That’ll be one moment.”

    “You’ll get a fifteen thousand dollar raise after the fifth, twenty thousand after the seventh, thirty thousand after the ninth and another thirty thousand raise after the tenth match. That’s five thousand for the first five, then...”

    “Yeah, yeah, I get it! I can do the math; you don’t need to tell me every little detail.” The man did not look happy.

    “That’s five thousand for the first five, then twenty thousand for matches six and seven, then forty thousand for match eight and nine, seventy thousand for match ten and one hundred thousand dollars for every match you win starting from match eleven and on. At match fifteen you get a choice to retire or continue on. If you decide to carry on, you will get a chance to retire every five matches after that. So at matches twenty, twenty five and so on, you will get a choice to retire.”

    “Here you are sir, five thousand dollars all in hundreds.”

    “Thanks.” Ben put all the cash into his backpack and started making his way home again. When his building came into view, it seemed as if his entire body had been hiding his tiredness. His muscles released all their tension of the past few days and his eyes suddenly became very heavy; as if his body had forgotten what rest was until he was only moments away from his bed. You can’t forget how to sleep, just like you can’t forget how to die, thought Ben to himself as he kept on.

    Three buildings before his own Ben walked into an old, brown building. The paint was peeling in places and the floorboards croaked endlessly. Ben walked up the stairs which were located a few metres away from the entrance. He walked swiftly and quietly to room 206 and dropped the backpack in front of the door. He knocked as loud as he could to make sure they heard him. When he heard footsteps and voices coming from the other side of the door, he ran as quickly down the hall, down the stairs and out the door.

    When Ben finally returned home, he took his clothes off as fast as he could and dived into his bed. There was no time for anything else, everything else could wait. Right now, everything he needed could be found in a queen size bed.