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Rated: 13+ · Short Story · Comedy · #1395293
Chemistry is boring. Who doesn't talk to themselves when they're bored?
A circle here, shade a little there, and to top it all off, giant man feet!

Ha-ha. Wow. I am a terrible artist.

I mean, Mrs. Weavers’ mustache is way out of proportion to the mole on her chin. Oh well though, it’s pretty freaking hilarious. I better put this masterpiece away before Mrs. Weavers quits her lecture to actually look at the class. I don’t think she would appreciate it as much as I do.

What the-? Is Toney Jordan drooling?

Ha-ha! This is great.

And Mrs. Weavers doesn’t even notice too! She just goes right on about her stupid chemistry crap. I mean honestly, when he wakes up, he might want to wipe his mouth. Seriously…

So… yeah. I probably should start on some notes today.

Okay.

Note taking shall begin.

So according to that diagram thingy, the atom is attaching itself to a… what the hell is that anyways?

It looks like a disfigured potato-like being.

Tommy Bradford threw potato chips at me today at lunch.

What a freak.

Anyways, chemistry. Yes, fun! Not.

Well, damn. The slide changed. And now the diagram’s different.

So, this one has a bunch of letters and circles. And that means…err… something?

Okay, note taking over.

That was very educational Mrs. Weavers. Thanks.

So now I have nothing to do. Maybe I should start another drawling. Those never cease to amuse-

“Jamie Garret are you paying attention?”

Oh come on! Of all people…

“Yes, Mrs. Weavers, of course.”

What did you expect me to say? No?

“Well if that’s true, can you please explain to the class the relationship shown in this diagram?”

Man, I would love to just wipe that stupid smug grin right off her face…

So, the diagram… Damn. It changed again.

Err. Let’s try and make up a bunch of shit and see if I can get away with it.

“Well, the atom on the left is clearly… positively charged. And therefore not attracted to the… err… triangle…thing.”

Good one Jamie. Just… great.

“No, Miss Garret. That is incorrect.”

Yeah, yeah.

Chemistry is stupid.

“I’m very disappointed in you Jamie. You have so much potential, if you would just pay attention…”

Okay, she does realize that Toney is still sleeping?

“… by just applying yourself to your utmost abilities, you could…”

Guess not.

“Jamie, do you know what your biggest problem is?”

“Well, personally I-”

“It’s that you don’t believe in yourself. If you just get the confidence, you could do so well…”

Okay I guess that was a rhetorical question.

And does anyone else think Mrs. Weavers is bringing out her Dr. Phil a wee bit too much?

“Now Jamie, I hate to do this, but I have to give you a detention. But you do understand why though, right?”

And Toney Jordan drools on…

Okay. What’s with the uncomfortable death stare?

“Err… yes Mrs. Weavers.”

“Very good, Miss Garret.”

So that one wasn’t a rhetorical question? You can’t change it up like that on me woman!

And now I’ve got a detention slip. Joy. And I get to spend my whole lunch with stupid Mrs. - why is Tommy Bradford waving at me?

Ew. Was that a wink? Wow, the freakishness is just rolling off him in waves today. 

Huzzah! The bell! My savior!

Ha-ha.

Toney Jordan has a giant spit blob on the front of his shirt.

It kind of looks like a disfigured cow...

Ha-ha, Toney is lactose intolerant.

That’s ironic.

I wonder how long until he notices?

Wow. For such a big guy, Toney sure does squeal like a girl.

Oh my- ha-ha! In his panic in hiding his spit cow, he hit Tommy Bradford in the face!

Wow. Tommy's sqeal is even higher than Toney's!

Man, this is great...

Thank the world for small favors.
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