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Rated: 18+ · Script/Play · Comedy · #1271545
God, if he exists, is not good.
... continuation of part I. Read part I first *Wink*.

          INT. - RESTROOM - DAY

          "5. Thou shalt not kill."

          SON ENTERS. Two pairs of men legs are visible under two toilet
          stall doors. It's JACK and next to him BOB, an overweight
          young man (judging just by his legs). Son comes closer to
          the big RED-FRAMED MIRROR hanging on the wall above the
          sink. He does his hair in a hurry. The mirror reflects a big
          POSTER on the opposite wall: "Do not kill the Earth, call
          (555) 555 5555" written with RED LETTERS.

                              BOB (O.S.)
                        (in English)
                    Of course I do separate the paper!
                    Into five different boxes according
                    to its thickness. You know, Jack,
                    it's my small contribution for

                              JACK (O.S.)
                    But do you tie your cardboard
                    together?

          Son sprays Aqua di Gio on himself. He opens the tap and
          leaves water running, wasting a lot of it. He takes out a
          compact toothbrush and toothpaste from his pocket and
          brushes his teeth in a hurry.

                              BOB (O.S.)
                    Tie the cardboard, Jack?!

                              JACK (O.S.)
                    Don't you know that you should tie
                    the cardboard together when
                    recycling? I recently read a book
                    about it, "Bobos in Paradise" by David
                    Brooks. He says that on Judgment
                    Day that guys who tie their
                    cardboard together will go to
                    heaven while guys who don't will go
                    to hell guilty of murdering the
                    Earth.

                              BOB (O.S.)
                    Shit, I didn't know that! Jack,
                    what about guys who tie their cardboard
                    with a plastic string?

                              JACK (O.S.)
                        (seriously)
                    Hmm... He doesn't say... I guess
                    they end up on the fourth terrace
                    of Purgatory...

         

          Son is ready. Letting the water run from the full-opened tap
          he LEAVES.

          INT. SERVICE STATION - "THE BROKEN TEN" RESTAURANT - DAY

          "6. Thou shalt not commit adultery."

          When SON comes out of the washroom OLGA is on her way back from
          FATHER's table, having just brought the ordered pizza, coke
          and coffee. She carries empty BLUE TRAY. Son approaches her
          cockily.

                              SON
                        (deepening his voice)
                    You look frightened! But no worry,
                    you're safe as long as I'm around.

                              OLGA
                    Frightened? I'm just surprised that
                    the dressed-up guy who came with
                    you...

          She points at FATHER.

                              OLGA (CONT'D)
                    ... is eating his pizza with a
                    knife and fork. And washing it down
                    with coffee!

          FATHER adds some ketchup to pizza.

                              OLGA (CONT'D)
                    Bloody Hell! Did you see that?

                              SON
                    Oh, he's Russian, it's a five
                    thousand year old Russian tradition.
                    Don't you recognize him? You must
                    have heard about him on Fox news?

          Olga smiles suggesting that she has heard about the Father.

                              SON (CONT'D)
                    The guy is kinda big shot in the
                    Russian mafia. Do you see his briefcase?
                    It's full of cocaine, guns and
                    money. Six million dollars in cash!
                    He travels around robbing banks,
                    restaurants... just for fun.

          Olga looks at Son with big eyes.

                              SON (CONT'D)
                    I work as his interpreter. I was
                    doing a degree in Russian
                    literature for six years just to
                    minimize danger of a
                    misunderstanding with him.

          Son grabs Olga's hand.

                              SON (CONT'D)
                    I can improvise a Russian poem for
                    you.

          Son notices that Olga has a wedding ring on her finger. Their
          eyes meet, but neither Son nor Olga stop the flirt.

                              SON
                        (recites in Serbian an excerpt
                        from Alksa Šantić's 'Svijetli dan'.
                        Need of translation into
                        English)
                    Od Kosova, od Vardara, Gdje
                    robovski dršće glas, Gdje krv brata,
                    sa handžara Dušmanskoga, traži
                    spas, I ja dođoh, sestro, vilo, Da pozdravim
                    slavlje milo, I sa onih tužnih
                    polja.

                              OLGA
                    That's beautiful! But I didn't get
                    a word...

                              SON
                    Oh, Beatriche, it was about us gliding
                    together through the seven levels
                    of Heaven, veiled only by

                              OLGA
                    You're sweet... Are you trying to
                    pick me up?

                              SON
                    Absolutely not! The thought hasn't
                    gone though my mind more that seven
                    times since I met you. I can't
                    involve myself in a

          Olga looks at Son surprised and slightly disappointed.

                              SON (CONT'D)
                    ...as I live in a constant danger...
                    I clean after other people for
                    living.

                              OLGA
                    Clean? You mean... Oh really? So
                    you must have a gun!

                              SON
                    No; I can kill a man with bare
                    hands. Black belt. Seventh dan.

                              OLGA
                    You don't look that fit though...

                              SON
                        (recovering from the
                        confusion...)
                    That's a front. Never underestimate
                    the element of surprise.

          Olga bursts out laughing.

                              OLGA
                    You're such a friggin' liar. And
                    your poem - Russian?!!

          Son stares at Olga in total confusion.

                              OLGA
                    Honey, I'm Russian! I'm married!
                    And I'm not an idiot.

          Olga starts to walk away.

                              SON
                    Wait a sec!

          Olga hesitates, but stops. Son half-opens the front of his jacket
          and searches through his business card folder. He has tons
          of different business cards. He takes out the one saying he
          is a martial art master. He shows it to Olga.

                              SON
                    Look! I'm really a martial arts
                    master.

          Olga glimpses at the business card. The phone number on the card
          is (666) 666 6666.

                              OLGA
                    Yeah, sure, my brother has a bunch
                    of fake business cards, too. He
                    tells girls he's a filmmaker! See
                    ya, babe!

          Olga walks away.

                              SON
                    Shit!

          INT. RESTAURANT - DAY

          "7. Thou shalt not steal."

          Son comes back to Father at a fast walk. Father is watching the
          recorded closeups of ASTA's body on his camcorder.

                              FATHER
                    You are twenty-two and still not married...
                    Are you engaged with anybody?

                              SON
                    Of course not! But I'm dating
                    singles, swingers, tons of girls!

                              FATHER
                    "Tonnes" is of no importance with
                    regards to love. One

          GEORGE comes in and interrupts their talk.

                              GEORGE
                        (to Son)
                    Yo, your car's fine, it was just
                    out of gas. You're good to go.

                              SON
                    Thanks man! How much do I owe you?

                              GEORGE
                    77 bucks will be enough.

          SON is completely surprised with that amount. He hesitates but
          he takes of the 77$ and gives it to GEORGE. He is very angry
          with that. Father is surprised by the amount of money Son
          gave George.

                              FATHER
                        (in Serbian)

                             
                    Are you crazy?!

                              SON
                    What could I do!

          Father looks deeply into his Son's eyes.

                              FATHER (CONT'D)
                    Are you in love with somebody or
                    what?

                              SON
                    Dad, please just finish eating you
                    pizza in a civilized way!

          Father hits the table with his fist.

                              FATHER (CONT'D)
                    I'm not a barbarian!!! Since the
                    Middle Ages Serbs have used a fork.
                    Theopanu, a wife of the emperor
                    Otto II, introduced it in the tenth
                    century.

          FATHER speaks out loud in a mighty and sublime tone with
          some difficulty though, taking a deep breath now and then.

                              FATHER (CONT'D)
                    It is written: I, God of Abraham,
                    God of Isaac, God of David, tell
                    you: Thou will be eating with fork
                    until the end of times as thy hands
                    are dirty and thou are not an
                    animal! Praise Lord your God! Hiob,
                    Chapter 7, verse..

                              SON
                    You're making up bible verses
                    again!

                              FATHER
                    I am not!

                              SON
                    Yes, you are!

                              FATHER
                    How dare you, you... agnostic!

                              SON
                    I hate when you do that! Dante,
                    Russel, Bible! Did you come here after
                    all these years just to educate
                    me?!

          Father stands up instantly.

                              FATHER
                    I came to see if you've become a
                    man. To see what will remain of me,
                    when I'm gone! You are the blood of
                    my blood and the flesh of my flesh!

                              SON
                    You was not even able to feed you
                    family!

                              FATHER
                    Our country was flooded with blood!
                    What could I do?!
                   

                              SON
                    You are always useless!

          Pause. Father speaks slowly through the teeth.
                   

                              FATHER
                    Am I? Watch then, carrrrefulllly!!!

          In a blink of an eye Father opens the black briefcase and takes
          out a pistol. With some difficulties, although quickly, he
          climbs the bench he was sitting on. He aims at people in the
          restaurant.

                              SON
                    Father!

                              FATHER
                        (in Serbian)
                    Any of you fascist bitches moves
                    and I will execute every last one
                    of you!

                              SOMEBODY (O.S.)
                    Hey! What is he saying?!

         

         

          "8. Thou shalt not bear false witness against thy neighbor."

         

          Father starts to cough heavily. People in the restaurant
          form a group around them. Whispers can be heard: "Should we
          call police? Or maybe an ambulance?".

                              SON
                        (to the people in the
                        restaurant, in English)
                    Everybody stay cool! This is NOT a
                    robbery!

                                                        CUT TO:


          INT. CAR - DAY

          "9. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's wife.".

          "10. Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's goods."
                   

          SON drives the car like crazy.

                              SON
                        (trilling and laughing
                        nervously)
                    Fuck! Life is full of misery,
                    loneliness and suffering - and it's
                    all over much to soon. They might
                    have called police! Why did you
                    have to do that? Are you fucking
                    crazy? How come you got a gun?

                              FATHER
                    I bought it.

                              SON
                    What? Where? Here?!

          Father takes out the gun and presents it to still terrified Son.
          The landscape around looks very familiar. The only
          difference is that the road sign with the white goose
          sitting by it stays "Service Station 10km" this time. And
          there is a huge maple tree on the side of the road.

                              FATHER
                    In Dollarama. It cost just one
                    dollar... To be honest, I didn't
                    even pay...

          In that very moment Son notices a white home goose crossing
          the street. He reacts immediately, taking a fast right turn.
          The sound of the crash is heard. A bush growing on the side
          of the road flames with fire.

         

          FADE TO BLACK

         

         

                    END
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