IF THEY ONLY KNEW

Standing there, biting my lip not knowing whether to scream or bite someone's head off. Boy is this PMS something, please if your coming, please announce yourself and come in! Why, is all I could say, why do folks always want to think, feel or believe that everyone, someone or somebody has it in for them. Oh, for some odd reason when truly we all know, or should we keep it a secret for all of us on board, their shortcomings.....please! Did it really go down like that, was all that could register in my head at that moment as I waited for my train to come. Last night was truly a disaster for so many reasons and what's most sad, no one even had a clue. Well I guess everyone probably wants to know.....what's wrong with her? What's wrong with me, no you all are the problem. All my life, I had to figure out why people treated me mean for absolutely no reason at all, when I walked in to a room, joined a group of people, it didn't matter. I would have to play the touchy feely game, did I say something wrong, did I look at her/him wrong, well guess what....that's all change, damn, they did say 'Lordy 40' was a trip. Is that what I'm approaching....As I stepped on the train, I made peace with a few of my routine morning train riders that I normally greet during the morning work week rush hours, the usual wide eyed friendly grim smile. I grabbed my normal seat on the train, took out my laptop; I figured I'd check out my calendar see what's happening this week, who I'm meeting with this a.m. prior to getting in the office and answer any emails. I ran out of the office so fast Friday and after this crazy weekend, I can't remember who I'm suppose to meet with this morning. Shucks, I could use another another two days off. Looks like I'm with my high priority customer. Boy, this political game they play in Philly, kills me, just absolutely kills me. Where was I, oh last night with those damn fools. Anyway, enough of those folks. It looks like Keisha finally responded. I'm sorry, Althea, I won't make the dinner party, gotta go to New York for the weekend; Darry'ls mom is in the hospital, we'll chat later. love ya, Keish! Again all I could drum up at that moment, was Geez, will that woman please give it up. Darry'ls gonna marry Keisha whether she approves or not. I tell you mother's and their sons, Ms. Jones, girl let him go, let him give Keisha the headache. That's a reminder too..oh, later for that! Next email from Al, please check your calendar and be sure to record all appointments. What, okay, he can't get away with that one, that's it, I've had it with bosses, nothing else to do but torture their employees. Matter of fact, I've had it with customers, colleagues, in-laws, sister friends, girlfriends, you name it, I've had it. I give up on this, I need a new circa! better yet, how about a new life! I knew I should have stopped at Dunkin' Donuts and grabbed me a medium coffee, my normal two and two on my way to the train. I need something to give me a kick, I'm feeling sluggish. I don't know why I thought I would miss my train. They know me well anyway, as soon I walk in, they don't even ask, they just make the ole medium two and two, ring it up and collect their cash. That ole Big 'D'&D' as my old colleague Paul used to say, would be really satisifying this Monday morning. Maybe too many apple martini's and getting in late. Althea, you know darn well you don't hang out late on Sunday's, shucks, I'm normally in bed in time to see Emeril Live and if I hang late, Iron Chef. But when the drama kicked off last night, it was poppin after that! I needed a few martini's to wash down the excitement from earlier that night. So with Keisha not being able to make the dinner party then that meant only six couples attending and that's including Wesley and me, makes it easier for me, I can only seat six comfortably in my dining room anyway. Ooh, the conductur came on, "City Hall is out next stop, City Hall"...."already", I said to myself and the saga begins. I closed by laptop, jammed it in by bag and scrambled to the doorway so I could be a few of the first to hop off the train. I made my way through the concourse, for some reason, I always feel connected to this place, My very first professional job was in center city, I use to walk through this dimly lit underground place. It's great in the winter, you don't have to go outside and freeze, but during the summer, it's pretty rough, the strong smell of urine from our nightly friends who utilize it as their own home, a place to lay their heads, especially in the winter, a place to keep warm. I made by way to Two Penn Center, up to the 21st floor; commenced to my morning wide eyed grim smile greeting for who knows how many times this morning, managed a few how's it going and ski-daddled into my office. If nothing else, this view is to die for; I went to close the door so I could put on my makeup........yep, I left this house this morning without any, I'm worthy, no bad skin, beautiful buttery brown carmeliscious skin, Before I could close the door and grab by purse, Jill peeks through with a few messages, I greet her, take the messages and asked if she could grab me a cup of green tea, she replies, no problem Althea, be back in a flash". She closes the door, I remove my suit jacket it's a little warm in here, or was it the walk to the office, oh yeah, I forgot, it could be a little private summer I'm having as well. I here a tap on the door, I know it's Jill, "come in I holler", Jill prances in, "nice dress I tell her", she thanks me while spinning around and says, "great buy at Daffy's". She hands me my green tea, I give her wink as my way of saying thanks. She asks, "how was my weekend?", I respond, "you don't want to know", she replies with a smurk on her face and says, "okay, you can fill me in later, by the way, you've got alot on your plate and so do I" and before I could blink an eye, she was gone. I cup my favorite mug between my hands, that's one of the reasons I love Jill, she pays so much attention to detail, a pet peeve of mine. I bought this mug back from Florida along with a few for the office staff. I take a sip of my tea, Boy, I like that new gadget they have in the mini kitchen, it makes great cups of tea. This green tea is great, they say the antioxidants in it are really good for you. I spin around to take a look at the amazing view from my office, this view is one thing that keeps me going, it's breathtaking, cumulus clouds, the sun is shining brightly, I can see the Ben Franklin Parkway, the Art Museum, the Free Library just to name a few, the buildings architect alone is amazing; such a beautiful morning, center city workers hustling and bustling along their way this Monday Morning, Jill's voice makes me jolt, "Al, Vera on line one",.....just when my green tea was tasting good. I spin around, pick up the phone, put on my most warm and friendly phone voice, "and Vera, how are you this morning" she responds, "Althea, it could be better, I need a favor from you", and I add "that favor would be"? Vera goes on to state, "I'm trying to close one of my commercial properties in 30 days and I still don't have my certificate of occupancy. Is there anything you could do"? Maybe you can talk with your friends at city hall to speed things up for me"? I reply, "Vera, let me see what I can do and I'll get back to you". She thanks me graciously and hangs up.....before long I hear the dial tone on the other end, I wonder to myself, what would that women do without me, she's the bomb, I'll admit, she's got it going on, but boy sometimes that women can drive me to drink, and it's not even 10:00 in the morning yet.