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Review by zijjh
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
This was an excellent peice. As far as comedy goes, it was well set up and the follow-thru at the end was unexpected. If this was a true story, then it is difficult to provide feedback for how to improve this peice, however, I would suggest that not so much emphasis be put on his anger, as it begin to get to the point, where you lose the fact that this is a joke. Conversly, it does help to draw attention away from the puchline making it even more comedic, so overall great job.
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