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Review of Johny Come Lately  
Review by Tiffany
Rated: E | (2.0)
As a Writer finding a voice for my characters is something I have had to learn to develop. so I am going to help you do the same. You are telling a good Plot but not a good story. language in fiction is different than simply relaying events that occur it has to be told in a way that can give your writing a life, a feeling. for example: In stead of saying "Jill went to the market to see him." I could say "Going to the market for Jill was the only time all day that she would get to see him." In the first I am just stating a fact: Jill is going to see him. In the second though I give the sentence a language that is creating feeling. This is the only time she is going to see him all day, is she excited, scared, hurt. I hope that you continue writing. with a little help I am sure that you will become a well developed writer. I look forward to reading more of your work in the future
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