the best definition of true love I have ever heard. That is the way I felt about my beautiful Ingrid even a year and a half after I lost her. You have touched the very reasons for the word love to be so very inadequate in explaining the feeling you get when you are truely with the one you wish to be with through all time. If you are lucky enough to find a second love it just seemed that you find a special spot in your heart to store and cherish that love you had with your first love. Then you open your heart to the new love and if it is right you have the same flutter in your heart and you know you have found that other special one. Thank you for a beautiful essay.
I just finished reading this chapter and found it to be a little confusing to begin. I became less so after I remembered the events in the previous chapters. It has begun to make more sense now. it shows the development of the characters that was not clear before. I think that the story will be clearer as to why and how it came to be that a prince of the realm should be in harms way.
Keep it up it has been a very entertaining read.
This story is a very compelling read. I have truly enjoyed it. The story line has he ability to bring the reader in and hoping the two will come to be friends or compatriots. The loss of Ayala's arm is a stepping stone toward the forming of an alliance when she gets over the shock of that loss. I am looking forward to the continuation of this story. I have bookmarked this and will keep reading it as the story is posted. Keep up the good work.
I have really enjoyed reading this story and am waiting anxiously for the rest of it. Thank you for an exceptional story. The development of the skills of Phoenix and the animosity of Karna toward Phoenix needs to be expanded and a combat resolution would be an excellent ending for it. Please keep the story rolling.
Still a good story not much dead spacein it. So far in all the chapters the only thing that hasn't been excellent has been the gramatic mistakes that I have already pointed out. good job on the tying the different threads togeather so far. I hope to read more of your work in the future.
You need to go back through your writing and do some editing. I read about six or seven gramtical errors. Case in point "I'm just trying to tolk some sense though into thick hed of yours." I couldn't find the instance readily but you refered to something in Laia's room that was obviously hers but stated it as "he". The story is still good.
It's starting to get better and tying in together more. the thread is starting to run in sequencial mnner now that the story is becoming more invoplved. with each chapter the story is starting to make more sense looking to make a better read. not quite a page turner but good none the less.
The story is still an easy read but there is lot of disconnectivity between the plots with in the plot of the story. Having been a reader of Asimov, Hanlein, McAfree, Paterson, and many other astablished writers, I feel like I have read some of the best SciFi out there This is on par with some of their early works.
They learned that the simplest plot makes the most entertaining and easy reads. So far there is to much jumping from plot to plot with out realy tying thing together. Torap it all up I am enjoying the overall story so far.
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