It's time to grow up

    Sometimes I wonder how a person can change so much within an instant. I often wish that a person would just stay the way they are forever.A childhood friend, a family relation, even an old enemy can have one moment, so drastic it recreates them.

    A moment in time that changes how you see things. At those times, I don't understand why that instant must come. I guess a childhood dream for everyone to always be reliable and never change gets crashed as soon as you are old enough to realize that it's part of growing up. It's taken me awhile to grow up.

  I've been reflecting on my life lately, and I can't understand how I hadn't grown up until this past year. I grew up in a small town with the population of less than three hundred people and as soon as I graduated; moved to Oklahoma City...you'd think the major shift in my habitat would help with the growing up, it didn't.

  I've had many chances to grow up and I never thought I would. Now that I have, I wish I could've stayed a child forever. Even more so though, I wish my friends would've stayed children too.I miss my childhood friends.

Growing up in such a small town, until I started elementary school; I had Afriend and she was my cousin. We went everywhere together, we related because we were both the stepkids of that family and almost the same age. My mother would tell stories of how we would neglect my little sister and never let her go anywhere with us; and her mother stories of how we'd  almost kill ourselves doing dangerous things. This was before we started school.

When we started elementary we were in a class of 10, with the most evil teacher alive. We started school together, but we met Paige and Jennifer there. Then there were four. All through elementary we were together, and when jr. high came around,we all transfered to a larger school;except for Jennifer. She stayed behind and was almost forgotten.

In Jr. High, We all split up. I'd hang out with Paige, and Amanda found the "it" group...she became a little differnt. I didn't like her as much, therefore only hung out with her at rare times, then Paige moved, and I was left alone. I made new friends but I missed my old ones.

In High School, I started hanging out with Amanda again, but then I became part of her crowd. Honestly, I didn't like that crowd. Never have i been a fan of drugs, yes I've been around it but I never really wanted to be associated with it. Just because I hung out with her I was.

At this time my mother decided she wanted to move away from my stepdad so we moved to Lake Dallas, Texas. To take care of my cousins who were my age and my younger sisters age. So, the opportunity came and I left. I could've stayed there. I had the option but I decided to move. That small move changed me drastically.
 
When we came back to town. I decided to go back to the school I originally started at, therefore I remet Jennifer. She had changed so much I wanted to cry. I did get reattached to her though and until I moved to Oklahoma City, she was my best friend. I haven't spoken to her since our sr. trip, but I was told she was pregnant. I wish I could find her number

  Paige moved back to the town we had all once transfered too and I can still tell her everything, even though I know she tells her mom everything, I don't care. She'll always be my bestfriend and I miss her more than life sometimes, when I think of how much she's changed.She's matured so much, and acts more like Amanda. She's still herself though, and still my tomb raider freak.

Amanda, well we don't talk much, she has a kid now, that i have never seen. I saw her when she was pregnant. I hung out with her a lot during her pregnancy, waited in line for her youngest brothers christmas present for over 6 hours. I remember going to the legion and just talking to her while she sat there and waited for her boyfriend to finish playing pool. I try keeping in touch with her through myspace but she never talks. I don't know whats going on in her life.

Now, it's finally my turn, I've been through hell and back this last year. It took me getting kicked out of my home in the city and deciding to move to actually get a job I've kept longer than three months. It took me getting kicked out, to realize how many friends I actually do have and I love them all. It took me losing my best friend to his girlfriend, who used to be my friend, to realize I have the best boyfriend in the world. I love everything about him, even his defaults, and it's taken me almost two years after high school to realize I want to go back, Therefore.  I will. I'm starting college in the spring. I'm finally growing up