I Love You

I can see your face

Bathed in sunlight

The horizon

Etched in red and gold

A hand of yours reaches up

Gently tilting my head towards you

I smile

And your face breaks into a grin

You bring my hand

Up to your mouth

Gently kissing it

Your ivory lashes feel like butterflies

Lightly dusting my face

And I can’t help

The few stray, salty tears

That trickle down my face

‘What’s wrong?’

You whisper in my ear

Mocking me

Almost mocking me

Your flaxen hair flops over

Into your eyes

And I can see the different shades of gold

Reflected in the sun

‘What’s wrong, little girl?’

I open my mouth to scream

But not a sound

Comes out

Your eyes flash dangerously

And a hand snakes out

Latching on to my wrist

Your grip

Turns icy cold

Then begins to burn

And a cry escapes my lips

I struggle desperately

As you laugh in my face

And your eyes gleam with a malice

I haven’t seen before

‘Please.’

My voice is desperate

But what really gets me

Is the way you don’t even notice

Plunging on like before

My breath hitches in my throat

And a sob escapes

I see a gleam of silver

And before I can dwell on it

There’s a blinding pain in my gut

Where blood is gushing out

The look in your eyes softens -somewhat

And you lower your head to mine

Pressing your lips to my forehead

Despite what you’ve done

Despite what you'll do

Despite what you're doing

I don’t try to move

‘I love you.’

Your voice is quiet -gentle, almost

Just a whisper in the wind

Your scent washes over me

And I feel... peaceful

Then your eyes flash again

And it’s like you’re possessed

I feel another stab of pain

And I’m suddenly aware of what has happened

The colours swirl around me

Pink melting into navy

Blue fading into grey

The sky darkens

Casting a shadow onto the ground

And you are back

Not some monster

Not some stranger

-You

Stroking my hair

And caressing my hand

Like you weren’t the one who caused it all

And, you know what?

I let you

I let you

Your eyes stare into mine intensely

Reflecting the question I couldn’t ask

‘Why?’

‘Because I love you...’

I stare back in horror

And you smile

What should have been comfortingly

‘I love you...’

And after all this

This is what causes me to break down

Not the blade you plunged into my gut

This

That you love me

-So why?

I cry, tears coarsing down my face

You hold me in your arms

Whispering in my ear

‘It’s all right.

I’m here for you...

I love you.’

Blood, sweat and tears mingle on my face

And I draw in a shaky breath

Your hand tightens painfully around mine

And I let it

The colours dull

Into dreary blues and greys

And my eyes begin to drift shut

Pain, so much pain...

I’m dying

And I can feel it

But you’re by my side

And, somehow... it comforts me

‘I love you...’