*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4712074
Review #4712074
Viewing a review of:
Daylight Saving  [13+]
Dark Poem about Autumn in 2021
by Jellyfish 12 years on WDC 💛
Review of Daylight Saving  
Review by Beholden
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  
Rated: 13+ | (5.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
*CakeB* HAPPY WDC ACCOUNT ANNIVERSARY FROM "Anniversary Reviews" *CakeP*


I love these lines:

"Daylight saving is ending
But nobody was saved."

You said it would be a dark poem and I can't argue with that. But it's a poem that holds just as much truth about autumn as all the reds and golds and falling leaves of billions of other poems. I've always thought that creativity is born more of sadness than happiness - sadness having time to ponder, whereas happiness is too busy being happy.

So it's no surprise that this is a very good poem. The descriptions given are quite evocative of autumn and its darker side (in more ways than one), sharply identifying the signs that summer is over and the winter approaches. There is a stark simplicity to the language that accentuates each vision of decay, bringing it into clear focus for the reader. Much of the poem is devoted to these descriptions.

Then the poem becomes more personal. Suddenly it's the narrator's mailbox that's filled with the dead and dying, and daylight savings time ends its pointless hold on us, without having saved anyone. Yes, we're all dragged in now and even the stars blamed for our misery.

And it's this about the stars that gives me my only doubt about the poem. I am unsure that it's fair to heap the blame upon the stars. I feel like a cad, quibbling about this, as the poem remains so expressive right to the last word, but I have to be honest and say I didn't feel right about that last line, even at first reading. It may feel as though the world is against us, but it's the way we see it and we should bear responsibility for that.

Of course, it's a very personal opinion about a poem that turns out to be personal in its intent. I'd be inclined to alter that last line to shoulder our own part in the deal.

It's a very fine poem, however, expressing a deeply felt response to autumn that may well be common to many of us, though rarely spoken. Applause for the poet. Oh, and a happy anniversary from me too!

Bulbul signature which links back to the group page
Small photo
Beholden


*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 09/25/2023 @ 2:22pm EDT
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4712074