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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4692164
Review #4692164
Viewing a review of:
 Pray  [E]
In times of grief, we pray.
by Pensive
Review of Pray  
Review by Tinker
In affiliation with The Poet's Place  
Rated: E | (4.0)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hi Pensive, I'm here at Read and Review and found your
 Pray  (E)
In times of grief, we pray.
#2292845 by Pensive

My review is to show you your poem through another's eyes.

*ButterflyV* First Impression Clearly this is a spiritual piece, by virtue of the title. But then, surprise in the first couplet, it's political. Oxymoron, who wouldn't read on?

*Butterfly2P* Form A poem, centered, written in 7 rhymed couplets and ending with a rhymed triplet, with no apparent metric or syllabic pattern.

*Butterfly2B* Texture, rhythm, word choice, and sonics Words that get attention, folly, spewing, contrive. Reads quite fluidly despite the lack of metric or syllabic consistency. The jump for negative to positive, couplets to triplet give this texture.

*Butterfly2T* Suggestions I don't really have any thoughts on how this could be improved.

*Butterfly2Y* Overall This was interesting from the title to the end line. Kind of a rant, but with a solution. Well done.

*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!.
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