Hi there Brenna ! "Gasp!" your being reviewed by a newbie! I am reviewing

Treasure of Gold  (E) A kid finds a treasure #1970991 by Brenna

General Impressions I found your story cute and your correct a child would think and behave that way. I think you did agood job on tell your story.

Favorite Parts Then it hit me i can dig a deep hole in the ground no one will find it there. I dug up a deep hole and dropped the rock into it. Yup just like a kid. I like the way you told this section of your story.

Plot One of the ways we review for plot is compare the title with the description and see how confused we get when we read the story. I wasn't confused because they matched. you did a good job on all of it.

Characters You did a great job on your characters. they were not over described and well rounded.

Setting You did well on your settings. But it would have been better if we knew where he was digging the holes at like a flowerbed around the house or a garden in the back yard. That would have added to the story and is always nice to know.

Dialog Since this is all first person it all is dialog and you used it well to tell the story and advance the plot.

Presentation I am taking the time to share some tips that show the professional from the novice. First tip professionalism is an attitude not a degree someone gives you. Second tip always read your work out loud before the final save. Third tip a professional always capitalizes their I's, spaces between paragraphs, uses indents, and never allows other people to see it until they have made sure it is their best work. You write like a professional would, you do need to pretty up your work like the pro you really are!

Please remember that you are best judge of what is right for your story Whatever another person says -- especially me -- whether positive or negative, is just their opinion You are the only one who can decide what is right for your story.

Thanks for sharing this item! I only review things that I enjoy reading and I truly did enjoy this piece. Please keep on writing more things just like this!!!








My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .