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Given: Mar 31, 2013 at 11:59pm
Length: 1,151 Characters |
1,123 w/o WritingML
And hello once more *flea333*,
Congratulations on your well-deserved win with this piece. I look forward to reading team New Zealand's work in this round of Project Write World!
What a moody poem this is, and right up my alley too! Again, I recognise your use of the same rhyme scheme, but you use it to effect quite a different voice. This reminds me so much of Tennyson's 'Rizpah' - with both yours and his possessing a particularly haunting, lonely texture. I liked your opening as well. You have a sense of the iambs once more as well. Your opening begins very much like Dylan Thomas's famous villanelle with, "Rage, rage, agains the dying..." as the echoing refrain. I produces the same effect of an off the beat, on the beat sound, whilst repeating the same word.
I loved your use of wording and tone throughout. You really do have a wonderful way with words, that had me so completely involved in the ambience of what you've written. I feel compelled to read over it many times. Wonderful work again, thank you for allowing me into the treasure trove that is your port!
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