Hello, PlannerDan . My name is Budroe . I will be reviewing your writing today for the Reviewing Reviewers ~ ON HIATUS . This review comes as a result of our long friendship, and my joy at seeing some new words in your port.

I hope you will find something you can use to improve your writing craft. Please use what you can and throw the rest in the rubbish, okay?

I. My general review of this work:

My very first impressions of your writing:

This is a "lazy day" story with a long-life emphasis. It's very good!

II. My specific review of this work:

A. Your overall writing:

Conversational and casual throughout, I felt like I was with the characters throughout. No hurry about anything here, yet a subject just so very important on several levels. Passing on traditions in a never-ending urban sprawl. Is there no room for "family", even in a sub-division? Superb allegories.

B. The theme (or tone) of your writing:

Grandfathers taking their grandsons to the site of family bonding and passing of the familial torch: an old tree.

C. The technical details (formatting, spelling, grammar, scientific or historical details):

I saw a few questions regarding comma placement, which suggests you worked the dialogue from a "hearing" or "speaking" viewpoint, instead of a reader participation viewpoint. But, just about every one of them was one of several possibilities. I left them alone (THIS time!{e:smile) Format, grammar, mechanics very sound, adding to the casual drama unfolding before us. Well done!

D. What I loved about your work and why:

I could feel the "overhalls", smell the grass, and feel the tire against my back, even as I held the knife, shaking in my hands. The personalization of the characters was rich, deep, and very memorable. Im my theater of the mind, this story played very well. {e:thumbsup}



E.What caused me problems, and why:

Understanding the need for action, I felt the transition was a bit rushed. It did not affect the story so much, it just left me in a bit of a lurch, even though it was predictable a little bit I wanted to savor the first course a bit longer before beginning the richness of the second.






Wow! I really enjoyed this story, PlannerDan . It has the taste of home, long ago country summer days, and the patience of wisdom throughout. It was a fun, entertaining read. Thank you.

Thank you for this opportunity to review your writing. I try to make my reviews relevant, helpful, honest and tactful. If there is one item on this review which helps you improve your writing, I am satisfied.

It has been my honor to visit your work today. I have written an introduction to my own personal philosophy of reviewing and critiquing the work of other writers. It may help you better understand this review:

Review Or Critique, Which Is It?  (E) An introduction to my personal philosophy, and why! #1168045 by Budroe

If you have any questions, concerns, or comments about my review, or suggestions about how I can be a better reviewer, please let me know. If you would like to respond to this review, or request another review of your work, you can always post at Reviewing Reviewers Public Forum .

We are all learning, and growing, and sharing our craft—or at least we should be.


Write well!


M. B. “Bud” Fields, Jr.

Budroe