Love Lost

Sometimes only words can describe this emptiness I keep inside. I keep trying and learning but never understanding why it just didn't work out this time. Maybe I should have listened, maybe I shouldn't have screamed and shouted, I just hate that this relationship was always doubted. Maybe I wasn't making the right desicions but atleast I was there trying to make a difference. He was everything that I've always wanted to be. I didn't want him to get the best of me. It was more then lust it was envy. But where is he now? He can't be found. And although I'll forever love him I won't let him keep letting me down.