Carly's Ramblings Blog - Style

Motivational Monday & The 'F' Word

30 Day Blogging Challenge

Motivational Monday!
Rube Goldberg was a cartoonist and inventor, and he was born on this day back in 1883. He's best known for creating complicated drawings and gadgets that perform mundane tasks. Tell us about a time where you intentionally made something harder on yourself to do...be it a task, a project, or even an interaction with someone (if applicable). What made you do it, and how did you get through it?

First off - Happy July 4 to my American friends!

I've enjoyed the gidgets and gadgets Rube Goldberg created. I have also enjoyed a few youtube videos of some who follow in his footsteps... but it is not something I would be finding myself doing... I don't think anyway, but necessity is the mother of invention and all that... who knows.

Discuss a time when I intentionally made something harder on yourself to do... I think, it would have to be in terms of interacting with others. I tend to let my fears build up over a situation and try to avoid it as long as possible before having to force myself to face the music, so to speak. Sometimes these interacts go quite well... all my fear and worry for nothing, except to raise my blood pressure and take more years of my life. Other times the interactions don't go so well... and they fester and crumble. Hence my marriage.... I often see myself as a sabotager - one who sees my life going well and thinking I don't deserve it so I sabotage it... I do not do this consciously, but when I reflect back over many of these interactions I can see a pattern I don't like... I am trying to change that about myself. I know I deserve better... hence reading and following the tenets of Love Louder: 33 Ways to Amplify Your Life. Intellectually, I know what to do, but I cannot seem to emotionally motivate myself to act... and be proactive versus reactive.

Love Louder - Amplifying My Life

I have decided as part of my blog to comment on each of Preston Smiles's ways to Love Louder. He has written an intriguing little book or 33 Ways To Amplify Your Life. The full title is Love Louder: 33 Ways To Amplify Your Life.

Day 6 - The 'F' Word! Forgiveness

"There is no enemy more fierce, harsh, and utterly ruthless than the one living inside our own heads. We hold ourselves in mental and emotional prisons for years, over something we've done or something that has been done to us. Tapping into the practice of forgiveness is powerful medicine for the journey of self-love and healing."
According to Preston Smiles, the key to loving louder is forgiving yourself and those who have hurt you. Holding the pain and resentment does more damage to you than it does to the other person. I have heard it compared to taking poison and expecting the other person to die.

"It takes courage to forgive those who may have harmed us, but we don't forgive people because we're weak, we forgive because we're compassionate enough to know that we all make mistakes."

Forgiveness does not mean forgetting. It is a process of releasing the hate and negative energy that binds us in that time and place. It releases us, from holding us back, and it let's us move forward in peace. "Forgiveness is a journey that takes time and effort, so don't condemn yourself for feeling what you feel.... the more you open up your heart to compassion, the more you begin to realize that most injustices come for a place of hurt within the wrongdoer and the only way to heal it is love." Anger and thoughts of revenge will eventually turn to love and compassion... but it takes a lot of time and effort.

It is important to remember that "those in the most pain tend to cause it for others, and instead of judging and punishing them, we should offer love and compassion." The Course in Miracles states, "All attack is a cry for help." Like a cornered animal, reacting out of fear. The 'I'll get them before they get me' mentality.

Consider the bully, that person probably grew up in rough environment... They have seen nothing, but what they have learned. The cycle continues... showing love and compassion shows them another way. It is up to them to take your reactions and either change or walk away. In my own life I have found that being kind to a bully pisses them off as you are not reacting the way they expect. They may come around or they may just move on to someone who will give them the reaction they want... but you will be free of their tyranny and feel okay with how you handled the situation.

"Forgiveness doesn't excuse what happened: it prevents what happened from destroying your heart."

"Hurt people hurt people. That's how pain patterns get passed on, generation after generation. Break the chain today. Meet anger with sympathy, contempt with compassion, cruelty with kindness, greet grimace with smiles, forgive and forget about finding fault, Love is the weapon of the future." --Yehuda Berg

Think of the kind of world we could have if everyone did that?

#LOVELOUDERCHALLENGE
Make a list of everything and everyone you haven't forgiven.
Then chose one and repeat with love in your heart "I forgive you for what you've done."
Continue to say it until you can truly understand it from a place of compassion.
Remember, we all make mistakes and we are all doing the best we can in this world.