Everyday Canvas

Venting – As in the Case of Feelings, Not Plumbing

Prompt “When one does not complain … one pays for outward calm with an almost unbearable inner struggle.” Charlotte Brontë
Do you agree with Charlotte Brontë? In what ways do you think venting works?

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Not exactly. I don’t agree with dear Charlotte in this respect, at least not 100%. She is correct, however, in the sense that feelings can involve the physical body’s reaction. From this point of view, Sigmund Freud would be the one to agree with her as he thought that the expressed emotion benefited mental health by releasing pent up ‘psychic energy’ or else, this energy would end up in neurotic symptoms.

For me, the advantage in venting is a mixed bag. I personally do not vent much because, to me, complaining makes the problem seem bigger, but talking to one person who is a close friend may prove to be a catharsis. I do vent in writing, in a private place, if I have the time and if writing the problem down by separating it into its elements would help me arrive at a solution.

I know when I get crazy angry, if I shut up instead of venting, the anger goes away quickly. Flaring up has never helped me; instead, it led to behavior I didn’t like to see in myself. Venting is not a good anger management solution, I think.

In cases of worry and sadness, on the other hand, talking to someone close or writing it down does help relieve some of the burden. Talking about a problem with a cool head or examining it in some way, without whining, helps to identify the feelings and to re-channel them toward more productive actions.