The Five Strands of A Sedentary Empress

Wii

We finished watching two seasons of Dexter. Last night, we thought we had at least four more episodes to go when the last disc only had the finale, provoking 'awwww' and 'really?' from the two of us. It has become our thing, our time to hold hands and rub one another's back. He starts out in his chair nibbling on cereal or bagels, before finding his way to my side of the room where we both feel the skin of the other while watching simulated mutilations. Odd, but true. What will we do now?, we both wondered aloud. There isn't much to choose from. I'm more of a movie buff, whereas he's a new junkie, and when we can't find the proper enthusiasm for what's on, we retreat to our separate computers and lose the night that way. I think technology is fabulous, but in two ways it is not: 1)It does not promote togetherness by way of touching or artful conversation and 2) it is steadily contributing to worldwide intolerance and impatience.

No one can wait anymore, and many people are having trouble focusing. It's probably why the whole ADD/ADHD phenomenon is taking North American by storm. I look to myself as an example. I can barely handle it when my connection on the computer is lost, regularly whisper salty words when the server to my email is too busy. I hiss and bubble when I can't find the remote for the television, unable to grasp that I can still switch channels, but that I will have to stand up to do it. I want instant results, having grown up in a world of microwaves and fast food, and I am beginning to realize that it isn't healthy. My impatience has made it nearly impossible for me to withstand the idea of 'staying the course' with regard to my anxiety. I want it over immediately, and somehow have decided that I shouldn't have to deal with backsteps and a lengthy process. I stop eating healthy when I don't see drastic changes in my pant size overnight. I can't stand in long lineups, handle wordy explanations, read instruction booklets, try anything again after a first failed attempt or listen to speeches without my mind meandering off to fantasy gardens, unless my anxiety takes over and leaves me breathless. I know it, and I despise it. Patience is a good thing, as is diligence, and I know if I had either I'd be licking a lot of my problems. I'm not alone, though, and at least part of my childhood was slow-moving and unmarred by technological advancement. Anyone born after 1982 or so had more to contend with, I think. Gone was 'Pong' only to be replaced by steadily improving, more realistic games, and gone was the electric typewriter gifted to me in my teens because people were only using word processors from then on.

I remember transitioning from vinyl and cassette tapes to cds. It was weird, but interesting, and I had more than one (tedious) conversation with a gorgeous musician about the benefits of owning a cd player who said they were crystal clear, easy to take care of, smaller, compact...R. was my boyfriend then and he bought me my first cd player for Christmas 1991. It was huge, a veritable 'boom box', but it was amazing to listen to, so sharp and precise. I still have that thing, but it is in Kitty Kat's room inside a dresser where it can't be seen. I keep it for a lot of reasons, not the least of which is sentimental. I do still own the records, though. They're locked away in a trunk in the basement, a mix of my youth in cracked and worn sleeves: Duran Duran, New Order, Erasure, Depeche Mode, Van Halen (seriously), U2, The Go Go's, Whitesnake (I'm still laughing about that one, bought it to impress a hairmetal boy), and a pot pourri of 45's ranging from Kim Wilde to T'Pau. In our living room we have an antique turntable, M's father's from a zillion years ago, and we keep saying we need to see if it will accomodate my own musty collection. It may not, since the records with it are classical pieces on 78's from the 30's and 40's, but those would be nice to listen to, I think.

But we listen to music while running now, or driving in the car to wherever we are expected. It becomes background music while we're typing, or is shamelessly attached to a commercial on television so the association with art is over and done, replaced with the frivolity of endorsement. Many people forget what music is for because it's now about image, about attaching ourselves to that image rather than appreciating the lyricism, the magic. Certainly there are ardent fans out there who really listen, who know the words and feel the poetry in them, but I don't think it's what the majority of people are doing anymore. Just look at who is making the music for proof of what I'm saying.

So, we don't listen well anymore, and we don't focus or know how to sit still for more than a quick minute. It's not just technologie's fault, but it's part of it. There is an unconscious laziness to our world now, an unwillingness to make an effort to do even the smallest things, like listen to the music, check our spelling, speak in complete sentences...

I miss parts of the older way of doing things. I think people were far happier.