Ten-Finger Exercises

What's a good name for a person who's annoying?

Mrs. Peevish, I'll call her. Her constant questions, requests, requirements and impositions are the problem. Maybe I shoudl say 'were' the problem, but...well, that's my problem.

Mrs. Peevish wants to buy our airplane. She talked to Bill numerous times. It was due for an annual inspection, and our mechanic had not had time to do it. She wanted it done immediately, so she could learn about and buy the plane. So Bill arranged to get a ferry permit (which is needed for a plane 'out of annual'-- one that is overdue for its annual) and get it to another mechanic in another city. That's what Mrs. Peevish wanted, a new pair of eyes going over it. Not that she was paying, of course.

During that time she made countless calls about whatever was on her mind at the moment, both to Bill and to the mechanic. For example: "What color is the interior?" Bill told her it was dark red, kind of burgundy. "Send me some pictures." So he went out to the hangar one cold weekend, uncovered it, and took pictures. "They aren't very good." Considering the light available that gray day, they were pretty good. "That doesn't look like burgundy to me," she calls Bill to say. "Would you say it's burgundy?" she asked the mechanic." (Is she nuts? She's asking two men about colors?) Then she called me. "It's more of a dark plum, wouldn't you say?" I agreed.

She wanted us to pick her up last Sunday at ll:30 to look at the plane. She had a ticket to come up from Arizona. I whined about this last week. After we'd made plans to do that, she changed hers and came Monday, and took up half Bill's day and all of his patience and then some. He asked her for a deposit, and she said she preferred to pay for it all at once.

Wednesday she emailed him that the pictures had been "deceiving" and that it hadn't met her expectations, just looked like newly upholstered seats and not too new. She intended to offer us a lower price than we were asking.

Bill was so upset that he got the chills and started shaking. His blood sugar ran way up. He said I'd have to deal with her: he couldn't do it. He didn't even want to sell the plane to her any more.

So I emailed her back, telling her what all was done to the interior and when and at a cost of $3400. Also said that I was sorry it hadn't met her expectations, but that I couldn't imagine anything Bill or the mechanic could have said or done to accommodate her any more than they already had. However, the plane is priced below market value, and if we wanted to sell it for less than that, we had a previous offer. And wished her good luck finding another plane.

The next day she emailed back that if the price was firm, that was still okay, she still wanted it, and we'd talk more when we get back from our cruise.

So...now what? He doesn't want to sell to her, not now and not ever. He figures she'd keep on calling to complain about every little thing, and I don't want him to have to put up with that. On the other hand, he's been terribly slow about getting the plane advertised in the first place, and we paid $1500 in hangar rent that I'd rather we hadn't had to, not to mention the new annual, the new altimeter for $1000, et al. And airplane buyers don't grow on trees!

Maybe I can email her later in the month to say she will be dealing exclusively with me from now on, that she is not to bother Bill any more. (If he'd go ahead and list it online in an ad, maybe I wouldn't have to. It is priced low, and maybe the right person would see the ad.)

Tomorrow, weather permitting, I'll drive him over to the next city so he can fly home and put Carrie (the plane's name is Carrie Nation) back in her hangar. We certainly hope we can do that, because otherwise she'll be tied down on the ramp over there, in these strong winds and rain. Not a nice thing to do to a plane. And we'd hate to leave on vacation with her out there.