Mental Meanderings

How one sicky could lead to a writers death.

Ok, so, yes you all know by my moaning and growning these last two entries that I'm sick. Near deaths door dying. Accompanied in every motion by the angel of darkness, listening to the chorus from heaven, kicking the bucket, pushing up daisies, toward death. Yep, exageration.

Anyway, yesterday I gave myself permission to take a sick day and, shock horror, NOT WRITE. Oh my God, never again!!! You wouldn't believe how hard it was to make sure I did my 20 minutes today. All day long I kept putting it off, "I'll feel better, more up to it later." "I don't have to push myself, I'm not well." etc. It was all crap, procrastination excuses.

Giving myself some slack yesterday made starting again today so hard. I think it would be easier to write 20 minutes every day come rain or shine or fever. It doesn't matter if what I write is terrible but it's important to keep that promise to myself. Keep that routine. It would have been so easy for this one day to lead to two, three, seven, ten, twenty, a lifetime.

A writer's death. One day without writing can be a writer's death. Thankfully, I didn't put up with that shit from myself. I removed all my excuses and I sat down and said to myself, "Pull up your boots Bec, it's time to write. Get that twenty minutes out of the way today because it'll be easier tomorrow." And I did it.

You know, the hardest part of it all was getting to the chair. Once I was sitting, the word program running, file loaded, timer ticking, the writing came easy. No messing about trying to figure out where I was at. No critique in my mind telling me I was wasting my time.

So, my advice to you writers out there. Take yourself seriously. Be your own best friend, be straight and honest with yourself. And don't cop out even once with a sicky. One day can lead you to a writer's death.