Monkeys

How to loose a friend in 10 days.....

Okay, so a lot of us have seen the movie, and here is the reality version. :)

HOW TO LOOSE A FRIEND IN 10 DAYS:

1. Ask them what they think about something and make them explain why. Get some good advice and then ignore what they say, and make it known that you didn't really need their stinking advice any way.

2. Get a girlfriend or a boy friend and then forget that your friends ever existed. Who needs em anyways?

3. Tell your friends you'll call them later to let them know if you have found anything fun to do, then bail. Don't call them....even if you find something fun to do! Remember, you don't want your friends hanging around you. You're trying to loose them...hello!

4. Talk about them behind their back. Say mean things that you would never say to their face. And make sure who ever it is you are talking to is someone who will go back and tell them exactly what you said. This one will work.

5. When confronted about #4, deny it all. If they have some sort of proof....tell them it doesn't matter anyways, because you have your new boy friend or girl friend.

6. Actually make plans with them. Somewhere that they have to drive a considerable amount to meet you, at a strange hour (rush hour will work too) and then don't show up. No call no show. You make have to do this a few times. It will take you awhile to get used to the guilt and it will be easier and easier to blow them off.

7. Get mad at them. For any reason. Maybe you just THINK they looked at you funny. No big deal. Let them know that you are extremly angry, and then tell them that you thought they were close enough to you to know what was wrong. You should not have to explain it. They will quit talking to YOU. Even better, then you don't look like the bad guy.

8. Repeatedly tell this friend of yours that they mean the world to you, and you will always be there for them. Put this in a letter, a card, an email....tell em in person or on the phone. Then NEVER be available. Even if they call you up crying.

9. Show no sympathy for them, in anyway, for anything they are going through. Her dog died? Make sure she knows it is probably for the better. He stunk anyway. Her Grandma is deathly ill? NO biggie. She stopped making good cookies years ago.

10. Borrow their things, and then don't return them until they hunt you down for them. Then, give them a similar item, and pretend that it is the one you borrowed.



This is a list compiled by me, in experiences I have been through. Kinda funny how often we do these things and don't even realize it, eh??

*Smiling*
Beckie