Sugar, spice, snails, puppy dog tails

Another New Year

         Another year has arrived, another survived and filed in my memory. Another Christmas passed without my mother, my father, my baby daughter, my missing grandchildren; but it passed also without any major bout of depression, just a couple of minor lows. My family kept me so busy and so involved that I didn't have time to have a big pity party.

         I've talked about my children some, but I want to dicuss my baby boy, Randy. Randel Louis Zabel, born September 15, 1966 with brain damage, fought not only to live, but to live normally. A motor-control center in the left side of his brain was damaged at birth, causing major dificulties for him when he tried to use his body.

         He was awkward and clumsy, but not only the outward movements were effected. His temperature, when he ran a fever, could not be regulated. He had seizures. He nearly died several times. Finally, with the help from caring and knowledgeable doctors and God's touch, the fevers became contollable. His seizures disappeared, but the control over his movements stayed a major challenge.

         Randy loved sports, especially football. His freshman year in high school, after daily practices all football players had to jump rope 100 times before leaving. Randy and his brother Bob were always the last ones in the gym. The coach would lock the doors and tell them to be sure the door was securely closed when they left. Bob begged Randy just to leave, that no one would know he hadn't jumped the required 100 times. Randy refused, insisting that he would and could finish. By the summer between his junior and senior years, Randy not only could jump 100, or more, times in one session, but he could do fancy things with that rope and never miss a step. His body had told him he couldn't, even his brother did, but he said he could and would, and he did, succeeding beyond his original goal.

         My youngest living child faced everything in his life as he did the jump rope challenge. If he wanted a skill, knowledge, or anything, or thought he needed it, he worked and tried and studied the problem for a way to conquer it. He may take longer than some; he may have to find a different way to succeed; but succeed he did, time after time after time.

         With a phenomenal IQ, even with deslexia, he graduated fourth in his high school class. He had a 4.0 average when he received his master's degree. He worked full time, helped with his children, and received a Ph.D. in government. His dissertation is now used as a resource in political science. While working on his Ph.D. at the University of Texas, he was selected to spend a summer in Russia (Siberia, actually) for language study, living with a Russian family as he attended classes.

         Easy? No, nothing he has ever accomplished has been easy for him, but he taught himself to make some things easier and to continue until he could do the others. He won't accept "I can't" as an excuse for himself or for anyone else unless a physical problem made a particular act impossible. If, however, the act only may be hard or might take some adjustments to do, "I can" became the answer he accepts. He passes this concept on to his three sons, expecting them to try even when unsure of themselves.

         Tall, handsome (his wife knows how his college female students look at him), and personable, Randy never gives the impression that his life has ever been hard. He's a son that any parent would be proud to have on loan to them during their lives. I know I am. Thank you, Lord. Blessed am I. I love you, Randy, more than you will ever know.


Viv, the teacher

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"My Method for Rating"  "Sugar, spice, snails, puppy dog tails"