Fighting the Current

Four paper clips!

I'm in a pseudo-Christmas spirit. Pseudo because I still can't believe December is halfway over. And Christmas because I got done the last 98% of my Christmas shopping today.

Happy Friday the Thirteenth!

Friday 13 has never caused me problems. Maybe it's because of my additude about it, lol.

Actually today has been one of the better days for me since this school year began.

But today was definitely not good at all for some people...

Something I was going to say... Can't remember.

A song is in my head. Some sort of hymn. It was in two unrelated movies we've watched in Theology. One movie was about Joan of Arc and the other was about Mother Teresa. It's in Latin, but all I can make out (or remember now at least) is "Dominus". I remember the tune though, lol.

Some useless knowledge about Joan of Arc. In French, her name is Joan D'arc. According to something I've read, her name really should not be translated as Joan of Arc. A man who recorded her life (possibly her father, I don't remember exactly) was not very well educated and misspelled her "last name" (originally supposed to be T'arc--I'd have to look up what it means) as D'arc. Hence, Joan of Arc. That may just be a legend. It's in one of the books I have. I'd have to sit down and search though. Actually, more like: stand up, pull the books off the shelf, sit down, search through, stand up, put them back, get other ones... That cycle has gone on for hours before.

I wish I'd had the time to make gifts this year. I pressed leaves and petals I could've used to make paper, but I won't have the time between now and Christmas for it to dry and for me to make little books. Maybe next year.

Speaking of pressed leaves and petals... Those should be taken out soon I think.

I may be dressing up as a Christmas elf tomorrow. We'll see if I can talk my way out of it, lol. "I'll type the entire newsletter with my toes if you let me not dress up... pleeeaassee??" My library is doing a children's program tomorrow, sort of like a breakfast with Santa... only there's no Santa.

Oh, I have a story which I have forgotten. Many, many which I have forgotten. Funny stories too.

Here's a quick one: I was in Walmart tonight and there was an elderly man helping my dad and me look for something. His name was Harold. His lapel covered the H, A, and R, leaving only: OLD.

Oh, and another. Much longer though. My brothers gave me an early Christmas gift today. We're in the mall and they just came from the dollar store. The older of the two said to me, "Do you want part of your gift now or later?"
"Later," I said.
"Are you sure? It's funny!" he said.
"I'm positive."
"C'mon, it's really really funny."
"Why? What did you get me?"
"You have to see it, it's really funny!"
"Is it something I'll use?"
"No..."
"Is it something that CAN be used?"
"Yes..."
"Return it."
"No."
"Return it. I don't care what it is, I don't want it. Go get your money back."
"We can't!"
"Then get rid of it, don't give it to me!"
"But we have to!"
I sighed and we kept walking for some time through the mall and then through Sears (I think it was Sears at least--I get department stores so confused.). My parents were looking at bags for our old vaccuum cleaner, when my brothers came up to me laughing.
"What?" I said. I was thinking they had turned on the vaccuum cleaners on display (I had pointed out that they were plugged in, some of them at least.)
"We have to give you your gift now," one of them said.
"Why?"
"Because it's SO funny!"
"Fine... get it over with."

They pull out from their bag a toilet-paper tube holder. One of those cheap, white, plastic ones with the springs inside. I was shocked and then started laughing really hard. I was practically doubled-over when I went to show my parents what they had bought. They started laughing, although slightly appalled. The woman helping them started laughing too.

There's no return policy at dollar stores. Anybody want a toilet-paper holder? Anyone? Do I hear 25 cents? 25 cents? 10? 10 cents? 5? 5 cents? ... free??... I'll pay you to take it?... STILL NO TAKERS?!?

Talk about a useless Christmas gift.

Well, they gave me one suggestion for what to do with it. They told me I could spring it at people...

They swear it was an accident. They forgot they had it in their baskets before they paid. Suuure...

Of course, in the car on the way home, they had to make songs up about it:

"On the first day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me:
A toilet paper tube.
On the second day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me:
Two plunger heads [their other gift idea for me].
And a toilet paper tube.
On the fourth day of Christmas, [purposely skipping three]
My true love gave to me:
Four paper clips,
Two plunger heads,
And a toilet paper tube.
On the fifth day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me:
Five copper pennies,
Four paper clips,
Two plunger heads,
And a toilet paper tube.
On the sixth day of Christmas,
My true love gave to me:
NOTHING!"

They're so kind. They came up with that song in the car in the 5-10 minutes I was in another store with my mom looking for something for my aunt and uncle.

Their next song?

"Deck the halls with toilet paper,
Fa la la la la, la la la la
'Tis the season for cheese graters,
Fa la la la la, la la la la..."

Thankfully, that's as far as they got.

Thinking again... (oo, scary, isn't it?...)

My mom told us about one of her brother's grade-school friends. He showed up at their house one day and proudly declared: "I just bought a reversible raincoat, so if one side gets wet I can flip it over and wear it inside-out!" He was completely serious.

I should go. It is no longer Friday the 13th. Good night...morning...afternoon...

(Timezones are so confusing...)