Sugar, spice, snails, puppy dog tails

Enjoying today, for tomorrow may not come

         We returned home today after a trip to our son's. We watched three basketball games, one Thursday and two this morning, Saturday. We preened and cheered as the grandson in a particular game played. Of course, we're not biased, oh, no! Robert and I are both quite objective. Anyone believe that? Then allow me to sell any believer some beachside property in the middle of the Oklahoma Panhandle.
         As we packed the minivan to return home, Robert became cranky and even a touch hateful. He hadn't had a good night, fought extreme pain with little to no sleep. That combination causes anyone to be less than a ray of sunshine. Robert is still with us really because God has granted him extra, perhaps borrowed, time. Yet, when he continues his complaining and finding fault and blaming me for whatever, I find myself becoming defensive and retaliating with sharp remarks. I know he doesn't mean to be hateful. I know he, in a way, has no control over his behavior; but, I reach my limit of silently ignoring his comments and retort in emotional pain and frustration.
         As we drove the seventy-some miles home, I watched my husband of over forty years as he sat beside me, his face drawn in pain. Suddenly, I realized that he may not be with me tomorrow, that the time is coming, perhaps too soon, that I will be alone. So he gripes, so he's not always smiling and pleasant - neither am I. The fact remains that he loves me. Me... the person who isn't always understanding... me, the woman who isn't a good housekeeper... me, the person who is no longer young... me, the one he thinks is still beautiful... me, the woman he calls sexy even though I've become almost double the size since we married. His love has not faltered in all these years, in fact it has increased, as has mine.
         Oh, please, dear God, help me to make the most of every moment you give us. Help me enjoy today, the good and the bad, because tomorrow may not come. How true that yesterday is history, tomorrow is a wish, and today is the present - a gift. Help me not throw this gift away.

Viv, the teacher


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