Fighting the Current

nonsense

Other people's computers just don't work right.

Mine? It smokes.

It literally sits there in the corner with a cigarette hanging from its bottom lip, no matter how many times we tell it that's unhealthy.

It seems to think it's a beatnik.

And that binary is poetry.

What's really sad is when it gets its midi-files up and running and there's a lone bass being plucked while it spews out random numbers.

It started innocently enough. I let it make snapping noises when I wrote poetry in Word. Then it went downhill from there.

You should see the beret it's got -- a ten-gallon one with a microchip pattern.

Then came the black outfit. I told it that spandex would not work....

::sigh:: It's not pretty.

Every time I write a paper on the computer, I have to manually edit out random direct addresses of "man". And

it has a habit

of formatting

my lines

for me.

The worst part is, I can't seem to convince it that beatnik is not its thing. I get messages like "Stop it, man, you're crowding the creative flow."

I'll probably get used to this all eventually, but I'm sorry. The sunglasses just look ridiculous.