Writing Blog Number 2

20240429 Handy Latin Phrases

Some Handy Latin Phrases

So, you have a story set in ancient Rome, and you want them to speak to one another. You can use an online translator… and get vaguely correct translations. But only vaguely. My old Latin teachers and lecturers would have conniptions if they saw some of the translations.

I know I do.

So… This is from some of my notes from too many years of studying a dead language, now only used on Vatican radio and in Oxbridge.

Greetings
Salve = Hello (to one person)
Salvete = Hello (to more than one person)
Vale = Goodbye (one)
Valete = Goodbye (more than one)
Ave! = Hail (to a superior)
Ave! Morituri to salutant! = Hail! Those who are about to die salute you!
         This was long thought to be the greeting of gladiators to an emperor or person running the show, but there is no actual evidence. Still, good to know.


Insults
Podex perfectus es. = You are a total arsehole.
Stercorem pro cerebro habes. = You have shit for brains.
Muliercula = What you call a woman who is not a prostitute, but you want to insuate she is.
Pavo absolutus es. = You’re a total turkey.
Ecce illa mammeata. = Check out those tits.
Ita vero? Tutene? Atque cuius exercitus? = Yeah? You and whose army?
Utinam barbari spatium proprium tuum invadant! = May barbarians invade your personal space!
Utinam coniurati te in foro interficiant! = May conspirators assassinate you in the mall!
Utinam logica falsa tuam philosophiam totam suffodiant! = May faulty logic undermine your entire philosophy!
Vacca foeda. = Stupid cow
Vescere bracis meis. = Eat my shorts.


Common Sayings/Quotes
Age. Fac ut gaudeam. = Go ahead. Make my day.
Potes currere, sed te occulere non potes. = You can run, but you can’t hide.
Nox. Modo fac. = Nike. Just do it.
Die dulci fruere. = Have a nice day.
Rex Mundi sum! = I’m the King of the World!


Miscellaneous
Credo Elvem ipsum etiam vivere. = I think that Elvis is still alive.
Pone ubi sol non lucet. = Put it where the sun don’t shine.
Ursus in sylvis cacatne? = Does a bear shit in the woods?
Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam. = I have a catapult. Give me all the money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head.
Estne volumen in toga, an solum tibi libet me videre? = Is that a scroll in your toga, or are you just happy to see me?
Fac ut vivas. = Get a life.
Mihi ignosce. Cum homine de cane debeo congredi. = Excuse me. I've got to see a man about a dog.
Mihi ignosce. Cum homine de anate debeo congredi. = Excuse me. I've got to see a man about a duck.
         This one’s for Schnujo Enjoyed Colombia.
Nihil curo de ista tua stulta superstitione. = I'm not interested in your dopey religious cult.
Noli me vocare, ego te vocabo. = Don't call me, I'll call you.
Nullo metro compositum est. = It doesn't rhyme.
Non curo. Si metrum non habet, non est poema. = I don't care. If it doesn't rhyme, it isn't a poem.
Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari? = How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
         This one’s for Adherennium Dr of Phoolishness
Prehende uxorem meam, sis! = Take my wife, please!
Ventis secundis, tene cursum. = Go with the flow.
O! Plus! Perge! Aio! Hui! Hem! = Oh! More! Go on! Yes! Ooh! Ummm!


And never forget:
Illiud Latine dici non potest. = You can't say that in Latin.

Use wisely. (And remember to pronounce V as W, and to pronounce every letter, except AE, which is one letter.)