The Alien in her Head

# An Alien in My Girlfriend's Brain: A Love Story

You know how some people say their significant other is "out of this world"? Well, mine literally might be.

Hi, I'm Allen, and my girlfriend Marney has a rock in her head. No, really. A meteorite, to be precise. At least that's what my drunk neurosurgeon friend Ken told me over whiskey at our favorite pub, the Thirsty Dog. (Yes, I have a drunk neurosurgeon friend. Don't we all?)

It all started when Marney got hit by a car while we were biking to said pub. One minute she was fine, the next she was in a coma. But here's where it gets weird: apparently, this space pebble was in her brain before the accident. I know, right? Talk about baggage.

So there I was, chain-smoking and chugging Guinness, trying to make sense of it all. Meanwhile, Ken's spouting conspiracy theories about men in black (or was it navy blue?) snooping around Marney's hospital room.

I rushed to the hospital, feeling like I was in some B-movie thriller. Half-expected to find Marney replaced by a pod person. Instead, I found her still comatose, but with suspiciously well-groomed bangs. (Note to self: even alien rocks care about personal grooming.)

As I dozed off in the world's most uncomfortable hospital chair, I had the wildest dream. Marney and I were in some shiny corridor, surrounded by people in hazmat suits. She was screaming about stolen codes and genetic reconfiguration. I woke up wondering if I should lay off the late-night sci-fi marathons.

The next morning, Marney had vanished. Poof! Gone! I panicked, thinking the Men in Navy Blue had abducted her. Turns out, she'd just been moved to another room. (Apparently, I sleep like a rock. Unlike the one in Marney's head, which seems pretty active.)

So here I am, waiting for my girlfriend to wake up, wondering if she'll start speaking in alien tongues or develop superpowers. Maybe she'll be able to predict earthquakes or control the weather. Or maybe she'll just really crave some space ice cream.

Either way, I'm sticking around. After all, how many guys can say their girlfriend is literally star-crossed?