Perfect death

All I want is someone who’ll be there for me, whenever I need them. I’ve never had someone like that. I know that it is foolish of me to dream of such things, but I just can’t help it, thoughts of happiness and love fill my mind but loneliness and despair caress my heart. A man is all I need. But no man could be the prince that every woman hopes she will find. It is not a matter of finding the perfect man, but finding the near-perfect man. It is rare that you stumble upon the perfect man; in fact there is no record of it in the entire history of the world. We see couples on the street that seem as though nothing in the universe could tare them apart, but on the inside every woman knows that he is not the perfect man, there is no perfect man. The perfect man is different to every woman, to some he is tall and handsome and silent. To others he shares every hope or dream that every entered his head, even if it only existed for a fraction of a second. For some he is athletic and fit, others picture him intelligent and scrawny. Any way you look at it no one is perfect. We spend our whole lives hoping that the one we catch will be, or become, perfect. It is a fruitless search that just eats away at the soul and leaves a bitter old woman. Those who are not, or seem not, bitter are the ones who have given up on the perfect man, realized that he does not exist, and are content to the man they have found. I will never be happy, for I am the girl who wishes with all her might that Prince Charming will find her and sweep her off her feet carrying her into a dazzling sunrise. I found my prince and he escaped me. It was but a shadow of him that I saw in a dream, but i longed so tenderly for him that I felt I should never wake. It is not only in the night that he comes to me. He haunts me. He follows me to every inch of my days and stalks me every second I breathe. It is on the days that he is most prominent in my life that I wish I could stop everything. Stop time, stop breathing, stop living. And it is in these desperate moments that I realize I am so close to death that I can feel it, Death is my Prince Charming. Death is the one the will sweep me off my feet and carry me into the dazzling sunrise. A sunrise that will linger upon my sleeping eyes for all of eternity. There is no perfect man, perfection lies only in new life, and new death.