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A look at the last day of my twenties. |
While lying in bed last night, it occurred to me that today was the last day of my twenties. I can clearly recall turning 20. Not the details of the day, nor what I did to celebrate. I recall the feeling. The excitement of no longer being a teenager but an adult. Little did I know that just turning 20 doesn't turn you into an adult. Adulthood comes with responsibility. While lying in bed last night, I recalled feeling as if my life were just starting at 20. In a way it was. Over the next ten years I would get married, twice. I would lose loved ones, struggle with my career choices, and make decisions that would affect my life forever. I would have a baby. While lying in bed last night, I mourned my twenties. I mourned the missed opportunities, the people I lost and those who lost me, the feeling that a decade of my life had passed and I had little to show for it. Nothing really tangible. I had memories and lessons learned. While lying in bed last night, my baby's incomprehensible babble floated through the monitor into my room. I realized that I have the most tangible of possessions. I have a child. A person whom I helped create. She's a memory and a lesson learned and she's real. While lying in bed last night, I realized that my life didn't start at twenty. It started the day I was born. I have memories and lessons learned that are buried deep and that I will never be able to recall. I have memories and lessons learned that are so brand new that I can replay them in my mind. Most importantly, I have a future. I have a daughter whom will rely on me to provide her with memories and lessons learned. While lying in bed last night, I realized that I will think back on the eve of the last day of my twenties and remember the lesson I learned. |