Mom Is Missing

         "I'll meet you at your house. No one is allowed at mine," I said with my eyes cast down to the ground.

         The truth was I could have all the company I wanted; but I didn't want to bring them home to a drunken mother, who would end up embarrassing not only me but my company as well.

         I entered the house quietly. I didn't want to disturb my mom.

         "Tracey, Tracey, is that you? Where have you been?" Mom slurred, screaming down from the second floor.

         "I've been at school, Mom."

         "Yea, sure you have, to learn to do what? Dig for old stuff, isn't that what you said you wanted to do? HA What good will that do you? Why don't you go to school for something that you can actually get a job doing?"

         Mom didn't know it and could probably care less, but the words she had spoken hurt me for the rest of my life. It's sad how a few thoughtless words can negatively impact you for the rest of your life. Words are powerful and should be used with care.

         I had tears in my eyes and thought, Well why am I going to school if I can't become an archaeologist like I want? What's the use? I took those words to heart and now school didn't matter to me. At this period in my life, I thought, what's the use?

         I went to school the next day but left before it started. A few of us got together and went to the beach. This was to become a new routine.

         When I came home I tried to be very quiet so I wouldn't wake my mother. Turning the doorknob to go into my bedroom, my stepfather stopped me as he came through the kitchen door. His face had a very tired and concerned look, "Have you seen your mom?"

         "No, I've been in school all day," I lied.

         "Well, your mom's been missing since this morning. I've called the motels and her friends and no one's seen her."

         "I guess we better call the hospitals and jails," I said, starting to worry a little.

         This is what we usually did when she went missing. Mom, most likely, had ended up in a motel room for a week, maybe two, to hide out during one of her drinking binges. When we'd locate her, a couple of us would get together to go and try and bring her home. Most of the time she wouldn't come with us. Instead. she'd chosen to stay there with a few bottles beside her for company. Vodka straight was her choice. It was many years before I could smell vodka without wanting to throw up.

         We would all keep an eye on her and bring her food. Sometimes it was better for her to stay at the motel because at home she would do things that would make a grown man blush. She would get pissed if we tried to take her bottle from her. She would grab another one, and run around and around the outside of the house naked as a jaybird. Sometimes even taking off down the street. At least when she was in the motel room, she would usually stay in the room, except to walk to the liquor store, (which was always very close by), for another bottle.

         But this time when she went missing, we couldn't find her anywhere. The cops wouldn't put in a missing person report for twenty-four hours. So we hunted and waited. Finally, enough time had passed, and we filled out the missing person's report. We were relieved we'd have them now helping us search.

         Two days went by, and we had exhausted every place we knew. We continued to hope she would walk through the front door at any minute. Ready to come home and sleep off another binge drinking. But staring at the door, and willing her to walk through, did not help. Over a week had gone by, and we were starting to panic.

         BAM BAM BAM Our hearts dropped when we opened the door to see two police officers. "We found Mrs. White. She's in Baptist Hospital."

         "How is she, is she alright?" We asked, holding our breath.

         "She's in bad shape, you'll have to talk to the doctor. We found her in the woods, nude. We can't tell if she's been assaulted or not. It looks like she's been there for a couple of days."

         The weather had been cold and rainy the last few days. To think of her lying nude in the cold and wet woods broke my heart. I was so scared. Was I going to lose my mother? I just lost my father a little over a year ago. Crying and scared, we rushed to the hospital.

         "We're here for Mrs. White."

         "Have a seat, the doctor will be with you soon."

         The doctor came out with a somber look on his face. "Hello, I'm Dr. Cladwell. Mrs. White is resting well now. She's in serious but stable condition. She's lucky they found her when they did. Her heartbeat was slow and weak. She also has a mild case of hypothermia. When we examined Mrs. White, we found she had an extremely high amount of alcohol in her system. Unfortunately, it also appears she may have been sexually assaulted and left for dead. She is covered with abrasions, but fortunately, she doesn't have any internal injuries."

         A couple of days passed before Mom was alert enough to talk. She couldn't remember anything that happened to her, or how she ended up in the woods. A little after a week she was able to come home.

         This incident really scared Mom. It was a long time before she went on another binge, and when she did, it wasn't as bad. There was also a longer period of time between her binge drinking.

         As she got older she finally conquered her drinking problem. It started getting to be longer and longer between binges. A few years before she died, she had finally gotten to where she didn't binge drink anymore at all.

         Many bad things happened to her during several of her binge drinkings. She always prayed that she wouldn't be drunk when she died. This was one time when her worst fear almost happened.