Sarah.

I lay my head down on Sarah’s lap and she ran her gently fingers through my hair. That motion alone sent me almost all the way to ecstasy. She slowly moved her hands to my ear and began to stroke the edge.

I adjusted my positioning so I could lay my head on her ample breasts. She smiled at me and began to gently stroke my neck. It was making me wild. The woman was a dream. When I was young I had longed for someone to love me the way she did.

My mother died during labour when she was giving birth to me and my father had blamed me for her death. My older sister had left us when I was still young and I haven’t seen her since. I sometimes wonder what she’s doing now.

I was still young when I met Sarah she was only 12 when I first went to live with her. We had grown up together and she came to love me in a way only she could.

She moved her hand slowly down to my stomach and stroked me very gently. I couldn’t take it any longer. She was driving me crazy. The way she made me feel was un-describable. I tried to take my mind off it. Tried to fight the impulse to pounce on her.

I had always wished I could tell her how much I loved her. I wished I could let her know how I felt about her. How I sat up worrying about her at night when she came home late, how I then thanked god for the relief every time she returned home safe but I couldn’t. She just wouldn’t understand me, and that hurt. I hated myself for not being able to tell her I loved her.

I tried not to think about my insecurities as the moment became more intense. Her gently stroking had driven me to the point of no return. I couldn’t resist it anymore.

As I placed my hand on her breast she twitched and looked at me with that loving smile. I put my mouth to hers for a long and passionate kiss but she didn’t respond. She just wiped her face. I grabbed her breast slightly harder and she pushed me off.

I looked at her as if to say, “What is wrong with you?”

She simply returned me an angry gaze and wiped the blood from her breast. As she walked to the kitchen to clean the cut I heard her mutter something beneath her voice.

“Stupid fuckin’ cat!” she said.

The next day she sent me away to the cat and dog home and I've been stuck in this tiny cage ever since. waiting for a new owner to take me home with them and care for me but I'll never forget Sarah. I still dream about her at night and wonder what I did wrong.

Copyright © 2003.
Tam Jamieson. J – The Mighty
Jamieson Industries. ®