Mirror, Mirror

Honestly, I can’t tell you what happened. I woke up this morning, went to the bathroom to shower and shave. The former was fine; the latter was where the trouble began.

I looked at the mirror to lather my face with shaving cream and … all I saw was the back of my head.

I turned to the right; my mirror image turned to the right. I turned to the left; my mirror image did the same. But I was still seeing the back of my head. It was like we were walking in the same direction.

I’m not sure what mirror me is looking at in the mirror, because while I see the back of my head, I do see the wall in the mirror behind me as well. I just cannot see my face!

Slowly I turn my head trying to catch a glimpse of the side of my face as it turns toward me. Slower … slower … but to no avail. My peripheral vision stops me short of seeing my face.

I head over to our other bathroom. The back of my head presents itself in that mirror as well. I yell to my wife to come here.

“What’s all the yelling?” she asks.

“Look in the mirror. Tell me what you see.”

“Are you serious?”

“As a heart attack….”

She steps behind me, and peers intently at the visions portrayed in the mirror.

“I see me, and I see you,” she says, somewhat triumphantly. “What’s the problem? And why are you dripping shaving cream all over the sink in the guest bathroom?”

I look at her reflection in the mirror. I see her mirror eyes look directly into my real eyes. Then I look into the back of my head. It’s just me.

“You don’t see the back of my head in the mirror? I ask, wildly.

“No, not in the mirror,” she says, as she takes a small step backward. Turning her head toward me, she says, “Now I see the back of your head.”

I don’t know what to do. Hell, I don’t even know what to say. How can I tell her all I see is the back of my head in the mirror. How crazy will that sound? I start to think, maybe I’m not even awake. That’s it; I’m dreaming.

“Slap me!” I tell my wife.

“What!”

“Just slap me … please."

“Alright.” She rears back and plants one smart, right open-faced palm upside my face, complete with huge smile.

“Wow!” I yell. “That really smarts.” Remind me never to cross my wife.

“Wasn’t that what you wanted?”

“Yeah, I did.”

After wiping the tears out of my eyes, I chance a peek at the mirror.

My face, the left side reddening before my eyes, is staring back at me!

Word Count: 470 words