When our Fur Babies go..

Something interesting happened recently.

It seemed oddly coincidental, yet still I wondered if it wasn't. Maybe it was more than that.

It has to do with taking my little dog, Kiki, with me places in the car. During the summer, I didn't take her with me often unless I could take her inside stores I'd visit. I sometimes drive out of town. It's just a few miles away.


There is a young man at the local Rotten Robbie gas station. The first time he saw my dog he literally came from behind the counter and ran over. In moments, he dropped to the floor to pet, hold her, and spoke gently to her. I stood watching.

Soon he said, "Aww, she's smiling." I never told him that she did that before this, but he noticed it.

My sweet little angel seems to somehow know when someone's needing some love. Either that or she's really just a little socialite. Even at dog parks she hones in on the people, not the other dogs.

Anyway, we left and went home, but he said to bring her by anytime to visit.

I said, "Okay I'll do that, but of course, only if the weather permits."

Several weeks go by, I allow her to go with me this time.. She mostly sits on the console and leans her little head on my arm while I drive. It's almost as if she's hugging me. But also I can easily curl my arm around her if I have to stop suddenly.

Anyway, we go visit the guy in the next town over at Rotten Robbie's. It's the usual petting session. Sometimes I bring the guys some fruit or something I bought from Costco, just do I don't end up eating too much of whatever it is.

We leave the gas station and I decide to go in a thrift shop in the parking lot across the street


After looking around in there, I find a few items, and I checked out. The cashier and I talked about our dogs. I may have mentioned that mine is in the car.

"What kind is she?"

"She's a tiny little thing. A Pom/Chi. Part Pomeranian and part Chihuahua."

"Oh, it's okay to bring her in. We don't mind."

"I would, but she'd be all over everyone in the store.". I laughed. "She loves people."

And so I returned to the car, let her out to go potty, then took her inside the shop. At the counter, the cashier oohed and awwed over Kiki.

While we're having our dog talk, she mentioned getting a service dog jacket for, as I mentioned she's also a service dog.

I noticed a man behind her, silently standing at the far counter. He's not moved for several minutes. He looks frozen, as if he can't move. I wondered if I was keeping her from helping him.. I looked at her then him. "I think he's needing you."

"No. I'm not needing anything," he said quietly.
"I was looking at your dog. She looks just like our dog. Ours died two days ago. It's really heartbreaking."

Sometimes I'm not sure what I'm thinking. All I managed to say was, "Aww." Then I asked how old she was. He said she was fifteen, and that she was his and his wife's savior.

While the cashier had been loving on the dog, I told him, "You can come pet her, if you like. She's friendly and loves everyone."

He walked over and did just that. You could see that she was thrilled. She laid her ears back at first, wagged her tail the whole time, and yes she smiled. He spoke more to me about his dog, Maybelline. He said something about his wife getting sick, yet I didn't quite pick up on that part until later.

I just kept wondering how odd this was. That we were both in the same place at the same time and we had similarities. Maybe I was making a big deal out of it. Maybe this was spirit speaking.

In hind-site, I wished I could have said something more reassuring. Like maybe his dog's little angel spirit is making a visit to say that everything is okay now. It made sense to me. I do think pets and other animals have a special purpose in our lives.

I asked the man if he had any pictures of his Maybelline. I figured he wouldn't if he wasn't telling the truth. Deep down, I felt he was being honest. I also realised that some people might not have pictures of their dog on their phone.

He did. He had at least three and yes she looked like my dog. Same Pom/Chi, except her fur had turned white as she got older.

I wondered about his wife. The thought crossed my mind whether my dog visiting them would hurt or help them get through grieving. Yet I didn't offer. I also wanted to share my own grieving process in order to show them that it's normal, especially when you had to choose between keeping your dog alive or not.

Years ago, one of my previous dogs, I suddenly found out that she had congestive heart failure, diabetes, and more. They said she was living off her own body fluids. I'd been given the option. To let her be put down or take her home and she might suffer.

I chose letting her go , yet I must say it hurt. I didn't cry out loud, but silent tears flowed down my cheeks nonstop.


Once I left there, I felt numb, like a zombie, going through the motions of daily living, and I still felt guilty for not protecting her from hurt. Basically I had allowed her to be put down. Did I keep her safe, like I had promised her from the first day I saw her? So you see I had conflicting thoughts.

I soon realised I had to do a few things in order to feel better about it. Yes, it was sad, but most of all I needed to think mostly about her needs, and then mine. I needed closure. I needed to forgive myself. I couldn't protect her from death when the time came.

I kind of sensed maybe this man and his wife also was going through the same thing.