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Rated: E · Short Story · Family · #2155162
True conversation I had with my uncle when I was young. FYI, I've never broken my promise!
"Do you know what this is?"

"Yes, Uncle Victor. It's a cigarette."

"You should never smoke these things, like I do. They're bad for you."

"Then why do you?"

"It's a bad habit."

"I know. But you could stop if you wanted to, right?"

"No. I'm too old to stop. You just remember never to smoke one. Ever. They make you stink."

"You could quit, Uncle Victor."

"No, no, no. I'm too old. It's too hard. Just like reading. Are they teaching you to read in school?"

"Yup. I love to read."

"Yeah, I never learned. I tried to go to school but the letters and numbers never made any sense."

"Have you thought about learning now? It's never too late —"

"No. I'm too old to figure out how to read."

"But there are so many fun stories out there, Uncle Victor!"

"That's okay. I listen to books on cassette. And the radio. But it's good that you know how to read. That means you'll be able to drive when you grow up. You make sure they keep teaching you. You listen to your teachers and learn and keep reading."

"Do you have a job, Uncle Victor?"

"No. I never learned to read so I can't get a job."

"That's too bad. Grandma never tried to teach you?"

"Times were different back then. Did you know I'm older than your dad?"

"How much older?"

"Twenty years! That's why I look so old."

"You don't look too old to me."

"Patty looks old, too. We're married but she's not allowed in my room because she steals."

"She shouldn't do that. That's wrong."

"I KNOW! SHE COMES IN AND STEALS MY CIGARETTES!"

"Shhh! Uncle Victor, Grandma says you need to lower your voice. You're yelling again."

"SORRY. Sorry. Patty shouldn't steal my cigarettes. They're mine and they're bad for her. They're bad for you, too. Promise you'll never smoke a cigarette, Jenny."

"I promise, Uncle Victor. I promise."

"GOOD!"
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