Criminally Insane

As I leave the kitchen where they are making us patients cups of tea, I take mine and head for the T.V. room and remote control. I just know it's gonna happen and it does - I see "Brian the Brat" rush past me and do what I just told you I planned to do. This would be fine if not for my knowledge that he only wanted to be his annoying self. Now understand that Brian couldn't bully any of us, just that he was so childish that us other patients treated him much how you'd treat a petulant kid and let him get away with such annoyances - though I'm, sure some of the more highly scoring (on P.C.L.R. - Psychopathic Checklist Revised) had there ways of getting back at him in private . Anyhow I mention all this as I need to begin this by helping you understand the childish and mean character that was Brian. He had a diagnosis of "Autistic Spectrum Disorder" and I don't know what else. I just know that Brian was one wicked, immature, brat of a man who never acted to help others and delighted in their suffering. Though, luckily he cast an unimposing appearance. The difference between Brian and all the "psychopaths" and "schizophrenics" and blah..medical jargon blah... in this institution was the plain honest fact that he was a nasty asshole - and he lived up to that. All the other "types"(I'm gonna say "types", I hate all this medical label shit but it does help in these situations to give you labels that you'll easily identify) they may smile or even help you out, but their motives remained a mystery. Brian was what he was openly and for that everyone both really wanted to yet really tried not to cause him harm (for the fact they'd spend more time locked up).
So here we are, Broadmoor Hospital for the Criminally Insane. Well that's it's old and famous title and I use it to make obvious that I was inside the one place that the worst or toughest to treat e.t.c ended up. However let me say at this stage two points; One is that a Doctor told me one time that their are serial killers there and there's even a man who only stole a pie there. Well whether or not this is true, it still remains that folk do not end up here for the crime severity but, for either severity or complexity of "disorder/illness". The second point is that I was no killer, rapist or molester, no my crime "didn't even show on the radar" in this place - I was here because they believed I had a Psychotic episode....again, I had something happen and I'd have to agree with doctors here, but then they also said I met criteria for "Personalty Disorder" diagnosis and if you don't know, well...it means basically that your doctor thinks you are an asshole in this way and/or that way and so these are disorders of personality (F.Y.I. Psychopathy is a personality disorder). The reason I've not gone into depth here is I only want to get across the fact that I am a lot like many who will read this, I am not super dangerous or cunning but feel fear and anxiety perhaps too much....No definitely too much. So I feel that when my psychosis has been treated I experienced this place and felt same emotions and felt daunted by all this the same as....say....perhaps YOU might do.
Now in Broadmoor the wards - where I had stayed - generally held up to 12 patients and seemed to only have about eight at any one time. Around this time (2007 - SUMMER) there came onto the wing a man who was famous within these walls (Notoriety in side and out was not uncommon of the patients here - we breathed air near the Yorkshire Ripper, Peter Suttcliffe. Though thankfully he was on another ward). The man who came onto the ward, funnily was named Manny - his second name was Mann,. He was short but very muscular, strong, psychotic, and intense. I got on with him right away, he was scary and somehow I could remain on his good side, also I actually liked him








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