Exchange (Second Revision)

Exchange

Ross Paraskevopoulos

         Julie sniffed her purple D'Allaird blouse's left armpit. Daniel bumped his nose on a wooden doorframe, poking his head out. She yanked a chunky can of sea breeze Aerosol that she found beside her old LG gaslight oven and sprayed the shirt's creased surface.
         "I probably smell just like a Greek mermaid..." Julie spoke through her hand, choking back a yawn.
         "I become more and more jealous of women's fashion every day I come here Julie," Daniel laughed and emerged from the bedroom wearing her prom dress.
         It was an ankle-length gown made of cream-colored satin which covered Daniel's hairy and pale thighs. There were light sequins all over the dress' body which exploded like the taking of a picture when they caught the light.
         Julie had never once laughed at Daniel's tendency to wear dresses. She thought it was a little strange, sure, but he wasn't hurting anybody else by doing it.
         It was 7:17 pm. Julie turned her head towards the apartment's glass windows. The skyline was a dark blue and she could hear a shout from outside: "It's a pistachio with a fucking face on it! Of course I'd laugh!"
         "I lost my virginity in that dust rag," Julie said, picking at a yellow skin tag on her collarbone. She walked over to where Daniel stood, by the fireman calendar he'd bought her for her birthday last year. She grabbed a pen to cross out her podiatry appointment on the 5th.
         "How was your first time? I mean, losing your virginity?" Daniel smiled and flopped onto his back on the brown couch in the middle of the apartment.
         She stared at Daniel's arms and legs draped over the couch's edges and jumped on him. She landed with a thud on his chest. She felt the jazz drumming of his heartbeat with her left pinky through the cream torso of the dress, illuminated like a discotheque from the rhinestones.
         Oddly, Julie could smell traces of the frozen spinach pizza she'd thrown in the garbage bag earlier in the afternoon.
         Daniel wiggled left and right but stayed pinned under Julie's light body. He laughed and swatted like King Kong at Julie's intrusive airplane arms. She lifted up the skirt of the dress and fitted her head in like an obstetrician on Viagra or a camper entering a warm tent. She thought of something clever to say:
         "Tonight is the night we fuck! You, my sweet, will bear many warrior children!" Julie growled in her best baritone.
         Daniel grabbed a violet pillow off the floor and smooshed Julie's face.
         "I am a maiden! I will remain chaste! Pure! Unmolested!" Daniel cried turning his head skyward. Julie brought her hands up to her ears to defend herself from Daniel's pillow swings as the blades of a helicopter could be heard spinning overhead.
         During his next swing Julie kicked the violet weapon out of his hands where it landed by an empty Naya water bottle on the floor.
         "Alright! I give in! Let me up now Jules!" Daniel said. He continued to push up and down but remained bolted to the cushiony surface like a rat prepped for dissection.
         "Are you getting cold feet? Don't worry, I won't bite!" Julie laughed and clacked her teeth together.
         Daniel scratched at dry skin on his lips. When Julie leaned in to kiss his chin Daniel put his arm on her left shoulder, holding her back. She then noticed two dried cracks of blood on his lower lip.
         "Did you get cut-" Julie started and stopped herself short. She leaned away from him then scooted over to the other end cushion.
         Daniel slowly straightened himself against the couch's back. The seats rustled as the material was messed about by the untangling of their bodies. Julie heard the old man next door fart. Perhaps he was sleeping.
         "You almost made a woman out of me Jules... Ha!" Daniel sniffed and smiled with his upper teeth showing.
         Julie wondered if he'd smelled her sweat. She remembered her first boyfriend had complained about B.O when they kissed that one time after Sex Ed.
         "You can keep the dress! I haven't- Well, obviously I haven't worn that since prom," Julie spat out after a pause and scratched her left breast through her blouse.
         She couldn't look at Daniel's face and planned to rummage under the cushions for an imaginary house key or remote until either he left the room or the apartment complex collapsed on itself from a spontaneous earthquake.
         "I'm going to get changed," Daniel said and immediately unzipped himself out of Julie's virginal gown.
         The dress flopped to the floor around his feet like a crumpled tissue. Julie peered up at Daniel walking away. He was wearing turquoise Jockey briefs and his tanned love handles spilled over the fading grey waistband ever so slightly.
         "I've got leftover chicken pie from St. Hubert," Julie offered.
         "Thanks for letting me be perverted Jules," Daniel shouted from the bathroom.
         Julie walked over to the white door and heard him fumbling with his belt buckle.
         "I'm going to put out a piece of that chicken pie for you okay?" she muttered and walked to the fridge. The lightbulb shone brightly in flickers and droned to itself as she opened the door.
         "Maybe what seems like random noise to me is perhaps a complex language to the lightbulb" Julie thought and grabbed the pink Tupperware with the squished brown pie crust.
         "If I could just find the right wave-length and tune-in maybe I'd be the first woman to discuss the moon landing with an appliance bulb! What a world!" Julie thought to herself and screwed her mouth into a gummy smile in the window's reflection.
         "Now, do you specifically like wearing my clothes Danny?" Julie said seated at the transparent glass dining table while chewing a piece of chicken pot pie.
         Daniel dropped his fork into his glass of milk with the tiniest Plop!
         "Ah....shoot." Daniel said bringing his arms tight to the midsection of his chest as if he were cradling a football in the last quarter of play.
         Julie swallowed her slice and felt the buzzing of a mosquito pass her ears.
         "Well it's not that I like wearing your clothes," Daniel began and stuck the soggy fork in the side of his mouth like a thermometer.
         "Oh really, you don't find getting into my pants exciting at all?" Julie said with a sharp smile, watching Daniel's jaw twist sideways.
         Daniel bent over and picked up the prom dress off the floor. There was a tear like bite-marks in the waist-line through which Daniel's monotonous black denim jeans could be seen.
         "Guess prom night's over," Julie muttered sarcastically staring at Daniel's right ear, noticing the way in which it curved inwardly.
         Daniel flipped up his shirt, patting his flabby stomach accusingly. Julie pictured running her fingertips around the belly button and her hair being pushed by his breath at night as they slept next to one another; cold and warm, smooth and enmeshed, comfortable and in-tune.
         "How did you lose your virginity Danny boy?" Julie asked passing Daniel another large slice of the chicken pie.
         Julie pressed her elbows onto the table and could hear the pleasurable squeaks from the bed-springs of the couple in the room above her. Daniel tapped his fingers on the table in an off-key rendition of "We'll Meet Again."
         "I think I'm...I'm going to skedaddle Julie. I'll see you sometime soon?" Daniel ended the silence and licked his lips leaving a gooey white film around their edges.
         In an instant he had walked to the apartment's red panelled door with his baby blue wallet in hand. Upon grazing the chipped grey doorknob with his left palm Daniel gave a strangely disjointed wave behind him to Julie. Then she heard his footsteps descend in single clatters down marble, then he was gone for the evening. It seemed to her as if Daniel had been under the momentary control of a domineering puppeteer.
         She looked down into her hands at the torn dress which flashed like paparazzi and ran to the washroom to vomit ever so slightly. Julie spent the rest of her evening on the couch, lights turned off, listening to her neighbours through the walls who were either fast asleep or making love.