Lost and alone

Lost and alone:
in a world that is no longer my own.


I got off the plane and was met by four people who I only have vague memory of. They had gotten old, but looking at them there were few memories. More like some one showing me a picture and telling me these are my parents. There is two strangers with them gotta be some one I know. Wait my mother called her Liz that's my sister and I guess her husband but I have never seen him. Everything is a new experience. Except it isn't I was here several years ago but as I am concerned I may as well be back in the desert, but the desert was easier there if I didn't know it I shot it. I don't even have my weapon any more that has been apart of me for so long that with out it I am half a person. Now I'm here and I can't even remember where here is.
I left the life I knew, a life that made sense. I woke up at a certain time do set things everyday. There was structure and discipline, I knew my place and I did my job exceptionally well, but here. Here is different my life has ended and I was thrown into chaos.
Hey you I'm here I don't know what to do! I don't know what to say! What is right what is wrong. I don't know so I do nothing and I say nothing and sink more into my own little world. Oh I hear you laughing at me, but you don't know, you were not there. I don't belong here I no longer belong anywhere it is gone, I am lost in the world that doesn't care.
They cared when you were killing to keep them free but when you are among them you no longer exist. You are a ghost spending your time in purgatory wondering if you can make it to heaven but knowing you will live in hell till the end, till the bloody end.