The Great Tabasco Fiasco

Jonesin' for some tasty Mexican cuisine,
I rambled down to a taco joint called Tabasco Jack's
and stood in line with some rowdy rednecks
to order hot tamales and refried beans,
which caused nasty reaction in digestive tracts.

Astronomical gastronomical turbulence
erupted with disastrous consequence.

With petulant pout, some flatulent lout
blew riveting rhapsody through his rectal flute.
A withering blast sent plumes of noxious fumes
across the room, as patrons scampered to escape.

Fire trucks with rescue crew, bomb squad and SWAT team
responded to calls
reporting weapons of mass destruction.

Back home, assaulted by a crippling case
of Montezuma's revenge,
I made multiple resolutions
to never, ever
patronize
that institution
of atmospheric pollution
again.

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Author's notes:

1. 116 words, 22 lines
2. Definition of verb to jones: http://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/jones#English
3. How to identify rednecks: http://www.countryhumor.com/redneck/mightbe.htm
4. Recipe for tamales: http://www.thekitchn.com/recipe-mississippi-delta-hot-tamales-recipes-from-the-k...
5. Explanation of Montezuma's revenge: http://www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/montezumas-revenge.html

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