Hopelessness

Hopelessness wraps you in its cold arms.

You know that you aren’t trapped,

Yet you haven’t a clue how to get away.



You tell yourself its all in your head,

That it really isn’t all that bad.

And even though you convince yourself not to jump,

You still know that it’s all over.



It’s not a matter of living or dying.

This pain and confusion is yours.

It is that extra limb that only you know exists.

And whenever you think you may have conquered,

Phantom pains bring reality back to the forefront.



You can ask the same questions as before,

Or forget the routine, and just wait.

Wait for it to pass.



There is nothing to do to hurry it.

There is nothing to do to slow it.

There is nothing to do to stop it.

It just is.



Just as the storm rolls over the land,

Sometimes fast and furious

Sometimes slow and laborious.

No one has control over the direction of the wind

And I have no control over the gray.



There is no reason to fight.

It’s not that I’m giving up.

It might be that I’m giving in.

But experience has forced me to understand

That nothing really matters….



Tomorrow is another day.

There is always the possibility of warmth.

But more often than not,

Hopelessness still has its ice cold grip on you.

And you still can’t get away.