Poems

A Love I Can Not Bear

I wonder what your thinking when you say you care
To want to be near me but unable to say you love me
To pull me in and push me away I feel as though this is unfair

I suffer with my thoughts and when I dream
Of your embrace and the smile of your face
My hope my sanity held by a thin seam

But I try to forget by wandering from place to place
Trying to ignore this false call
But when I hear your voice or see your words all I feel is my heart race

And here I am at ends wall
Stuck to where I want to go
To the right or left of this narrow hall.

- 1:56am San Jose California 12/29/2011

Showering

The brush of the water as it tickles my skin
With a cool breath of air sparkled with crystal droplets
Like controlled rain but only in my little zone
How good it feels to be under it
Bubbles floating up till they pop
Momentarily showing my naked reflection
The bliss the refreshing feeling that I feel
As if time slowed just for this one moment
But when it ends in time it will
I'm left cold shivering in the tub
Back out to a world of dirt and filth.

- 1:12pm San Jose California 12/31/2011


When Someone You Use to Love Doesn't Let You Forget the Story

Can you feel the confusion that you bring?
That hate, the love, the infamy of the thoughts that devour my mind
Ain't no song that cools thy rapid heart
No calming wind the howls in the storm within
I cry stop it! Please God just stop it all!
But just echoes in the silent dark
Silent? With all the clutter and voices saying yes and no?
A silence of noise that goes on and on and on
I want to scream or have I already done that?
I want to cry but my ears are already dry
Its too late too late too late
No more going back no more sighs and weeping
Let that bird sing for all I care I don not here its morning song
Let the baby giggle in joy for at least one person here is happy
Let the dog wag its tail as i stare down at it with empty eyes
Let no man or woman speak of the smile that ought to be there
But it is not and I don't care
I don't need these surfacing thoughts that make my mind so feeble
Sling back the past it is past your time
And let me go already
Let me live wherever I live and let me die being happy
Do not come do not seek me i'm not here to stay and wait
I'll go ahead and continue on
Till you can no longer reach me.

-1:34am San Jose California 1/06/2012

Storywriters

Lost in the fantasy, the makers we are
A winding tale breathed into the air around us
Will it make you laugh?
Will it make you cry?
To spin a tale with the press of a button
Sing a life with just a few words written in time
Tell me a tale so that I may listen.

- 3:56am San Jose California 1/06/2012