Father Time Is A Jerk

"There is no distance on this earth as far away as yesterday." ~Robert Nathan


I dislike time and its zealous way of always passing too quickly. It seems as if there is too much to do for things that aren't important, that it crowds out the things that are important. If there were a such thing as 'Father Time', I'd imagine him to sit and scoff watching us piddle paddle around like ants inside an ant pile. Climbing all over each other, going here and there, all having specific tasks to do, but never stopping, just working our lives away.......passing our families, passing up all sorts of wonderful things. I think he speeds up time, because it always seems that you stand with windblown hair, questioning where time has gone. How did your children grow so quickly when they were born 2 days ago?

I can hardly remember what 'slow down' means. I repeat this phrase to my children, anxiously hoping that they will one day heed my warning. I can't even practice what I preach. I can't slow down and relax for 5 minutes. I choked back tears most of the weekend because while I was so fortunate to have my sweet husband home, I, in the back of my mind had so many things that I needed desperately to do. I was needing to do the remaining homework that would be my regular work plus the week it snowed us out for a week, finish everything for my son's party and clean house and take kids to practices and games and take the snacks and get ready for church, (to which we didn't succeed at!!)pay the bills, get my husband ready to head back out, another child got sick for a brief period of time on Saturday........Many things I'm so very grateful he was here for, then again it feels like SO many more, utterly unimportant things that demand my time. I feel my precious time is already been prearranged to a schedule without my consent. Like a summer rain, the weekend, with my surprise guest has gone as fast as it arrived. I again say goodbye, watching his handsome face in the rearview mirrow of his truck as he leaves again. As he goes out of sight, I have the heavy weighted reality of another week about to begin, and I must begin my juggling act once again, in solitude.

Things must be done, yes, it's just the American way, but all I want to do is have my weekend back, push the slooooooooow button and really get to focus on my husband being here. I stole as much as I could though-- getting to walk side by side in wal-mart resting my head on his shoulder, hearing his ankle pop when he came up the stairs, drinking coffee with him, I GOT to do his laundry, see him hug on the kids, and the proud smile he displayed watching the girls cheer, the gentle way he snuggled our son in his lap when we were at the game, getting to lie next to him for 2 nights, his hugs and kisses being at my disposal and I got to tell him I love you while looking in his eyes! It's alot of things, yes, but still, you know how you want to give more of yourself to your husband, or children, or friends, and with so much going on in your life, it seems nearly impossible. Time is the new 4 letter word that I don't like using anymore, it puts limitations when I don't want them & asks everything of me, all to fly by at lightening speed in return!! It's annoying.

I can't wait for his traveling to be over, I miss him so.