Night Shadows

         Isabelle presumed her life was worthwhile. Being a high school student had never seemed much easier. Of course, when you’re popular what reason is there to worry about? This summer has come and gone. Now, she is looking forward to her new curricular school year. After all being a junior isn’t any stick in the bush.

         “Last day of summer” Belle sighs. This morning she didn’t feel very much in the mood to going out with friends, or even accompanying her mother to the mall. It all felt strange to her. She didn’t want summer to end. What would all her *popular* friends think of her when they find out she was pregnant? Oh, that’s right. What would her friends think when she told them,

“Heh yeah, I went to Mark’s party and got so trashed that I had a one night stand with some loser jock. Didn’t even bother to use protection! Don’t worry though; I’m planning on getting rid of the stupid thing soon. Not like I give a crap!”

         Truth be told, Isabelle knew she cared of what lay gently in her womb. She regrets being a fool and falling victim into this predicament. She cannot care for a child, much less raise one. She knows such facts and feels the need to stay in bed all day thinking of some kind of resolve. She places a hand over her little bulge, “What am I to do with you?” She breathed deeply as her mind began to swirl rapidly. Belle rolls onto her side and grabs a hold of her teddy bear. A tear rolls down her flushed cheeks. She feels the necessity to tell her mother but can’t bring the words to mind that might salvage her parents from disowning her completely.

         Belle’s parents taught her to be a leader, not an irresponsible tramp. Not that she thought of herself that way either. She dismissed her alarm clock which lay restlessly on her night table. Her eyes darting to the family picture of her parents as well as herself at her elementary graduation. How proud they must have been to be seen with such a delighted smile over their little girl’s achievement.

         As vile rose up her raw throat, she quickly hurried to the bathroom. Such relief comes over her after her stomach is done emptying out its contents. Belle regains her balance and stares blankly at the reflection of a lost soul. Such beautiful green eyes now shaded with lack of sleep, and immense stress. How could her world suddenly sink so low? Her auburn silky hair now filled with knots and is in dire need of a healthy wash.

         “Look at me now, everyone” whispers belle as she chokes on a gag. Nervous to find out her mother is back home early, she rushes out of the bathroom and finds herself rummaging through her closet looking for a loose blouse of some sort. Out come a loose sweater and jeans, and she hurries to the other side of her room to open the window as a bead of sweat trickled down her spine. She abruptly changes into her outfit and looks out the sun filled window. The bright sun staring down at her as if it felt she deserved a chance at life. Did she really? Or was she just a failure that messed up her whole future.

         Deciding to stop sulking, she pulls on her converse tennis shoes and ties her hair up in a neat ponytail. She feels the need to confront the so called “Father” of her unborn child. She wasn’t convinced he would take responsibility for what had occurred, but then again, neither did she. She knew what had to be done.