WORDS ESCAPE ME

                                                                WORDS ESCAPE ME

Grasping at words, trying to find the right ones.  I can never seem to find them anymore.  They used to flow so easily. 

They say that pain is the source of all great work?  How can that be?  The greatest things I’ve ever written were written before I lost you… before I knew what real pain was.

I want so bad to talk to you again, but even in your death, I cannot find the right words to express how I feel.  Lonely…not strong enough.  Missing you….still not strong enough.  Wish you were here….not even close to strong enough.

Sometimes, while I sleep, I dream that you are still alive.  I wake up, and reach out for you, only to realize that a memory is all that is there.  A great memory, just not one that I can touch or see.  I try to go back to sleep in efforts to capture that feeling again.  It never works.

You always knew the right words to say to me.  You were always so wise.  If I was in pain, you would find the words to comfort me.  If I was in turmoil, you would find the words to guide me.  If I was in distress, you would find the words to save me. 

Now, when it’s my turn to find the words for you, all of my words escape me.