On Pause ||

On Pause ||
The expressions of the people around me seem to melt in with one another
The smells make their way into my nostrils, yet I cannot identify them
The cool, humid breeze hits my cheek and forces the tear to go loping down my face
My boredom increases as I find myself trapped in a new, peculiar place
The palms seem to dance in the wind above me, while I sit statue on the block of cement in what is supposed to be a back yard
Spanish moss glazes the trees in front of me, as the water in the canal rushes with pride
Fish leap into the open air, making a splash that is not often heard
Fisherman blister, sweat as the poles are outsmarted by nature
A black, glistening object uncoils in the grass, slithering and sneaky, similar to high school girls
The voices of people are faintly heard in the distance, as they slowly and quickly approach
Bikes, roller-skates, feet
People on the path going in circles, not trying to jump start their lives, but their metabolism
The sky is a pale blue color, with shades of gray, due to the evening hour
Birds annoy the ear as they constantly make noise, repeatedly
The squirrels treat the trees as if they are poles to gallivant and shimmer down
Chasing each other like young girls and boys on a playground
I miss that
High school ended, and so did that portion of my life
Friends are gone, family is gone, home is no more
Indiana itchy cornfields, cool, cloudy days, black and white spotted grass grazers, all in the dust
I desired change, but now I am in over my head
My life is hollow, my goals are faded and small, God has pressed the pause button in my life
My age is in between. Too young to conquer the world, to old to enjoy it
Taken by Florida and its paradise-like feel, but missing the home I grew up with
Wanting to jet ski, kayak, boat, swim, fish, tube, walk, talk, meet people, work, dance
The person I do that with is in Indiana and her heart is here with me
Best friends, separated, equals agony
At 18, desires are bigger than realties, and all there is to do is move forward
Moving forward is impossible, on pause ||