comical bit of fun |
Get out of your coffin more often I heard the banging sound of wood As I was walking by I heard the sound from where I stood I thought that I might die! The reason for my state, you see Is it was past midnight I stood at the gates of the cemetery I nearly spat with fright! The knocking sound continued louder As I cowered to the ground I could have behaved a teeny bit prouder But, man, that chilling sound! Standing in a puddle of...liquid things could not get worse I began to feel a little insipid Until I heard the curse! No, not that kind of curse you fool, I mean I heard a rude word Now this is when I lost my cool: It said “Let me out, you turd!” Sitting (with a silent h!) My life before my eyes That voice again with me engaged And the ground began to rise! “Oh grow up man”, the ground then said “And let me have your hand And I don’t mean I want to wed, just get me out of this sand!” Curiosity drying the front of my pants I stepped towards the sound And from between the growing plants A hand pushed through the ground! Taking the slimy hand in mine (blocking my nose with the other) I pulled so hard it came right off “You stupid mother *%%*^ !” Now tired of this mannerless beast I found myself a spade and aiming wildly at his skull A round of golf I played “Now is this really necessary?” my golf ball said to me “I've had a rather frightful night as you can clearly see” “Now here’s a deal I'll make with you to show you that I care Lets finish the course and at the end My bottle of rum we'll share” Duly agreed upon this plan We both enjoyed the game And once the final skull was sunk Good friends we became. |