Why can't I just go to sleep like everyone else?? |
I hate the nights it's 4:30 am still awake, have been since 8am yesterday Can't sleep, want to but my mind won't let me insomnia sucks, it takes all the life out of me I see my family all sleeping snoring, cuddled under the blankets, grand baby's sleeping well, like baby's And me? I'm here in this big house awake, wishing like hell I could just close my eyes and sleep like everyone else I want to sleep peacefully and dream I never dream, why? because doctors say I don't ever enter "REM", the state in which you dream when sleeping My body is tired, my mind is restless therefore it won't let my body sleep. So why not take sleeping pills ha! that's a joke, I've tried everything under the sun and moon still nothing works, i can take sleeping pills like m&m's and still I will be awake I hate the night time, it only means I will be up alone with my wondering about all that has to be done during the day, I will be grumpy and snap at everyone because I'm tired If I nap during the day, once my body just can't take anymore, I feel guilty like I'm being lazy and I feel bad so I don't nap when I can because I don't want to seem like I'm a lazy bitch Why can't I sleep, i want to lay next to my husband and just sleep the way he does, but yet I can't, my legs will move and my mind will wonder and my eyes won't shut Fuck you nighttime you suck! |