The Chains of Home, Now Broken.

"Why are you doing this to me!" I screamed in utter rage. I was livid. My voice sounded now like a deep guttural growl because I was forcing my words out with such ferocity and everything I said was full of anger and hate. My madly beating heart was sending bouts of pain into my skull along while my pulse and a black blindness was beginning to fog up around my eyes; tears of pure frustration were forced out of me every time I blinked.

I was astounded by myself. I couldn't stop screaming, something had possessed me. I was simply housing it, watching the disaster unable to do anything but hope it ended soon. My hands clenched and unclenched causing my palms to bleed, but I was oblivious to the pain. I probably wouldn't have noticed at all if it weren't for the deep red that caught the corner of my eye. Four thin trails of blood led down to my fingertips, seeping into the creases in my hands along the way.

I was a 60 watt bulb in a 100 watt circuit, too much power was driving me forward. I was going to explode. My heart continued racing, so violently I could see my chest rise and fall savagely with each beat. My blind rage was quickly using up the little strength I had left, making my legs weak and my hands shake. A dry saltiness filled my mouth and my stomach churned; I knew I was going to be sick, and I needed to get out of there, away from the poisonous words being shot around the room like arrows. With one final shriek of fury, puking out my final jumbled words of rage, I stumbled backwards into the hall.

I clumsily ran outside and fell onto my knees, pounding the pavement with my fists as if it were the cause of my problems. I moaned quietly and rested my torso on my legs as I calmed down a bit. I became still and I lost track of how long I laid there silently.

Suddenly a thought occurred to me. I could go! I could leave! I rose and stared down the street thinking quickly. I needed to find an answer, and I knew it was out there, waiting for me to discover it.

I was a bit apprehensive for a moment, but I had always been the person to follow their heart instead of their head and the feeling faded. Then at that moment I knew what I needed to do. I ran. I ran until fatigue tore at my muscles and pain ripped at my lungs. I ran until my body would not move my legs any farther. I ran until I reached the highway then I paused. I bent over resting me hands on my knees while I gasped for air. I glanced behind me, at the path I had just run from. It sneered at me beckoning me back with well played lies. But I wasn't falling for it. That path behind my was small and lonely, while the path ahead of me was new and full of potential.

The nauseous feeling in my stomach faded and was replaced with a strange feeling that made me want to laugh. I began to walk slowly, taking in my surroundings. Night has always been a special time for me, and not because it is the time for wild parties and rock and roll. More because of the beauty of it. Night is calm and silent, and silence, I have learned, can ring quite loudly in your ears if you learn to listen to it. Lonely street lamps bathed the road with pools of pale yellow light, and the moon covered the rest of the earth with a surreal silver glow.

I lifted my eyes to the sky and couldn't suppress a small gasp. It was so big and brilliant. A feeling of sublimity washed over me and my mind stopped. All the thoughts and reruns of the hateful words said earlier faded like ghosts and drifted away with the breeze. Millions of stars covered the sky sparkling like spilled glitter. It was that moment I knew I had found my answer.

Some part of me that had been missing was suddenly, and without warning, snapped back into place. I was no longer me; I was nobody. I was someone completely new, with no past to haunt me, and no memories to plague me, only a future to be written. I felt like dancing, breaking spontaneously out into song or doing something rash like jumping off a cliff. What I did do was I flung my arms out wide, challenging the world to give me its best shot, and I spun. With my eyes lifted to the magnificent sky, a wondrous laugh escaped me. I was free. I was free.